{~Deku one-shots with angst~}

I Keep Silent (Like Swallowing Knives)

A/N: Welcome back to another chapter~!

Warning: This chapter will have mentions of blades, and some descriptions of that. If that makes you uncomfortable, I'd suggest not reading this chapter!

AU: Midoriya has always kept things to himself- he'd found that was the safest way to survive. Aizawa ponders how to break down those walls, and let the child learn to speak his heart out. 

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Silence is the remedy to peace, Izuku thinks. 

It's silence- but also not just silence. 

It's the safety of not having his words be used against him. 

It's the peace of not hearing his own rambling deafen him. 

It's the calm before the inevitable storm. 

And Izuku can't help but be hooked to it. 

"Izuku, my dear, you sure are enthusiastic about heroes, aren't you?" Inko uttered, brushing Izuku's hair off his face, "Your voice is the most powerful when it's filled with passion, do you know?" 

"Really, Okāsan?" Izuku had looked up at her with desperate wonder in his eyes, "I can be powerful just like All Might?"

"Of course, dear." Inko had smiled, giving her son a hug, squeezing the breath out of him. "I'm sorry it has to be this way." He thought he had heard her mutter.

And yet, he isn't powerful, is he? 

He was just...feeble, useless, powerless...another pebble on the road to someone else's victory. 

After all, no one had ever told him otherwise.

"You have great power, Young Midoriya...and those of us who have such power must always learn and act to save to win." Toshinori had smiled at him, as warm as the sunset, the crunch of sand tickling his toes. 

"I'll do well with it, sir." Izuku had promised, tears with his eyes. 

Power, hm? Strength, huh? 

How could he do well with it...how could he ensure that All Might wouldn't regret his decision? 

How could he live out his dreams, knowing his younger self wouldn't be ashamed? 

Silence is the remedy to peace. 

In order to fulfill his role to help others...in order to not ever pierce the hearts of those he loves...

He should remain silent. 

He should swallow down the knives that is his past; it is his past after all. 

The scars, the wounds, the dark, the light- they're all his. If his happiness is his, then should his sadness right? 

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Aizawa doesn't know how he can show Midoriya his own scars. 

Not just the rough patches of even tougher fights.

But the cracks in his heart from countless sleepless nights, the tear tracks of ageless mourning, and the never ending shadow in his mind. 

How can Shota help break down those walls that muffle out the cries of the past?

Would Midoriya even let him? 

Yet how can he let that stop him, when the boy is in tears in front of him now, refusing to let even a word out?