July 09 D- 37 Read a newspaper alone.
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Even though I had failed these past few days, I will continue fighting. Life is not as boring as others think... there are many things that can be done to get rid of boredom.
Natutulog pa rin si Dark Harris sa tabi ko, ang amo ng mukha niya. Marahan kong hinaplos ang kanyang pisngi. He looks tired. Ano bang ginagawa niya habang natutulog ako? I’m so worried about him. I don’t even know what he does whenever I’m unconscious.
I smiled. Just looking at him, touching him, feeling his presence... it’s already too much for me.
"D-Dark Harris, I will do my best to protect you." I whispered with a smile. "I promise." If something bad happens soon, I won’t ever leave him.
I held his hand tightly and brought it to my lips. I love him so much. Bumangon na ako at nagtungo sa kitchen. Kahit nahihirapan na akong gumalaw, pinagluto ko siya ng chicken curry. Wala talaga akong alam sa pagluluto, but because of him... I can cook now.
"Britney." I heard his husky voice. Dahan-dahan akong humarap sa kanya. He stared at me coldly. Kinabahan agad ako dahil sa madilim niyang titig.
"I-I’m sorry. Gusto lang kitang ipagluto." I said softly. He shook his head and sighed deeply. Bakit ba siya nagagalit? Mali ba na iniwan ko siyang mag-isa sa kwarto?
Bigla siyang tumakbo palapit at niyakap ako nang mahigpit. Ano ba ang iniisip niya? Humarap siya at tinitigan ako sa mata.
"W-Why did you leave my side? Fvck, Britney, I was scared. Akala ko iniwan mo na ako. Don’t do that again." he said coldly.
Tears welled in my eyes. Hindi ko alam na ganito ang mararamdaman niya. So dapat pala hinintay ko siyang magising? I shook my head. I just want to protect him. I want him to live long. But I never promised I’d always stay by his side.
"D-Dark Harris, p-please don’t be like that. I’m struggling too." I said in a cracked voice. Nahihirapan akong sundin ang kagustuhan niyang manatili lang ako sa tabi niya. Kahit gustuhin ko, hindi talaga pwede.
"Fvck!" His eyes welled up too. Gone was the fearsome Dark Harris... now he looked like a broken man.
"Please, huwag kang ganiyan! Huwag mong ipakita sa’kin na mahina ka! Dark Harris, please! I’d rather see the fearsome Dark Harris, not this weak one! Huwag mong ipakita sa’kin na hindi mo kaya kapag nawala ako!" I shouted as tears streamed down my cheeks. I turned my back on him.
"B-Britney!" he called, chasing after me. I walked faster, but he caught my wrist and stopped me. I couldn’t look at him... I didn’t want him to see me cry.
"P-Please… leave me alone." I whispered.
"Look at me first." he uttered. Slowly, I lifted my gaze to meet his eyes. Damn. His stare... it was back to being cold and scary. The weak man I saw earlier was gone.
"I’ll let you be alone." he said flatly. "But don’t go too far away from me."
I just nodded.
"S-Sa library lang ako pupunta." I replied before leaving him.
Nakarating na ako sa library. I immediately locked the door and walked toward the bookshelves. I sat on the floor and reached for the newspapers placed underneath. I needed to experience reading one.... it was on my bucket list.
Napangiti ako ng mapakla. No’ng nasa hospital pa ako, palagi akong humihingi kay Mommy ng newspaper para malaman ko ang mga nangyayari sa labas. Pero ayaw niya talaga akong pagbigyan. Sabi niya, hindi ko na daw kailangan alalahanin ang mundo sa labas. But I cared! But because of my illness, I lost my right to live normally. How unfair!
BINABASA MO ANG
100 Days Before I Die
Romance"100 days before I die. I made a bucket list for everything I want to experience in my remaining days. It wasn't only a bucket list but it became a lifeline - how I could squeeze out every minute of happiness of my already determined number of days...
