idk bro gimme a break

Lol I forgot another Asahi's blah blah intro ending -rejected

Relationships, Asahi isn't interested about it. But, if he will love someone, he wants it to be real.

But what is real and what is not? In this strange world where every men likes men, a BL world, would Hamada Asahi ever determine which is which?

No, because he was never someone who could.

Jaehyuk and him had been dating for the past 5 months, and to tell the truth, his worries didn't magically vanish out of thin air. As much as Asahi wants to eradicate doubts in his mind, there's a reason why their relationship never went further. Lots of questions mixed with anxiety. Nervous to take another step, Hamada Asahi never made it easy for himself. His mind keeps working and working, sometimes it stops but his brain was trained to observe his surroundings, it's hard to break off the habit.

Theorizing things, over-analzying every single events. Asahi hoped he didn't do those things but he can't help it, he tried suppressing it, but he failed, miserably.

He consulted with Jaehyuk about it, he replied with his usual "I can wait until you're ready Asahi-yah, take your time" in such a mundane tone, more or less, it made Asahi think of the what ifs. Jaehyuk isn't exactly a very low profile person, anyone could swoop in and get him if they want (what an insult)— not really, well, this world is still fictional, it could happen.

Asahi started focusing on unnecessary things instead of the main problem.

Above the worries he just elaborated, there's one that stays on the top of the list: When will he be ready for Yoon Jaehyuk?

He doesn't know. Maybe if someone dissects the word 'ready' and describe it to him by section, Asahi could generate his reply for that query. But no one would do it, not because people are tongue tied whenever he spits out the same question but.. the reason of why no one can help him is, Asahi never opened the topic to anyone else. Is he infact afraid of having 'that' conversation? Perhaps he is, Asahi never thought he'll get to the point where he would date someone. It seems like an unachievable dream due to the weird circumstance that the world is fictional. He assumed he'll grow old without experiencing going out with someone, female or male, he thought his beliefs would halt him from moving any further. However, He entered a new dark realm where there's no shed of light to guide him unexpectedly. It's a scary path, he didn't know he'll be walking on it, alone.

Staring at his phone, the time moved by a minute. It's friday night, a perfect time to spend time with each other. Jaehyuk is gonna arrive soon, they planned a movie date today.

Asahi took a deep breath, extinguishing negative emotions out of his system. Landing his gaze on the clock, he felt nervous, he can't get rid the swirling feeling in his chest. Uncomfortable and restless, Asahi closed his eyes and tried calming himself. It remained in chest, sitting waiting to burst like a ticking bomb. When he heard the doorbell ring, he jolted and ran towards the door.

The door revealed Yoon Jaehyuk with a huge grin and a box of pizza, also chicken and coke. He naturally let himself in and organized the food in Asahi's coffee table.

Meeting Yoon Jaehyuk hasn't been this unnerving, in their normal days, Asahi treats Jaehyuk casually. But today, something was definitely different, Asahi doesn't know why he's so tense. His stoic face made it worst, in his imagination, Asahi can picture himself looking constipated.

But Jaehyuk doesn't seem to notice, is it good or not? Asahi can't decide, he kinda wants Jaehyuk to acknowledge it but also not. However, if they talk about it, the atmosphere wouldn't be the same, it's gonna be heavy and Asahi doesn't want that.

Today should be about the movie. Not about their relationship, Asahi mentally covered his worries with a bunch of tarpaulins then launched his fist forward and told to himself 'Ganbare'.

.

Asahi has been thinking very loud..

So instead of focusing on the movie, Jaehyuk kept stealing glances at Asahi's direction. He wanted to ask Asahi what's wrong, of course, but he's worried he might spoil the atmosphere due to the possibility that Asahi might be thinking of something trivial (maybe inconsistencies in the movie). So, Jaehyuk decided to stay put.

After the movie, Asahi didn't say anything which confirmed Jaehyuk's guess that Asahi wasn't thinking about something else. Jaehyuk felt relieved knowing that.

But now, no one is speaking. The dead tone made it feel like both of them have something to say.

Which is true, Jaehyuk actually wanted to talk about their relationship. He's not sure about Asahi but if he could take a guess, it's also related to them.

"So" They said in unison. Jaehyuk's tone was high pitched, while Asahi's tone remained monotonous.

They locked eyes. Jaehyuk cracked a smile, finding this situation quite amusing, after a few seconds, he muttered "You can go first" Asahi didn't want to go first

"No, it's fine, Jaehyuk-ah"

"What do you mean? Didn't you want to say something?"

"You can say what you want"

"No, you go first"

"Jaehyuk, you go"

"No"

"No" leaning closer

Both of them realized their faces were an inch away from each other. Jaehyuk unconsciously examined Asahi's face while Asahi stared straight in Jaehyuk's eyes.

Jaehyuk gulped, being close to Asahi like this, is definitely not good for his heart. It makes him imagine things, Jaehyuk closed his eyes and moved away from Asahi.

A/n:
The build up is good, and it's a smoother transition however, if I go this route, the whole point of the fic wouldn't be... resolved, it's like, if I make things focus on: taking it to tier 1, it's going against Asahi (protagonist's) beliefs. It only makes sense if they take too long before Asahi is ready.

The best ending is, for Asahi to accept Jaehyuk as someone he loves and can call a boyfriend rather than a sloppy make out scene. Ngl i was gonna get lazy and shit, i kinda was but still I placed an element that caught the motives for the characters to move.