Mario, Sonic, Mega Man DEATH BATTLE! (Season 5) [REQUESTS CLOSED!]

Ryuko slices DEATH BATTLE!

Shadow: Thousands of years ago, aliens that would come to be known as Life Fibers crashed to Earth. These "parasites" attached themselves to the most intelligent species they could find: Humans.

Wario: And they even got humans to make them into clothes, so it was easier for them to live on us, and provide viewers with gratuitous fanservice.

Shadow: Tsk. Yeah. Anyway, the Life Fibers helped humans evolve more quickly, and soon just passively survived as humanity developed. But some weren't content with such passivity, like Ragyo Kiryuin, who had access to the original primordial Life Fiber that landed on Earth so long ago.

Wario: Humans being humans, in order to in act her selfish desires and plans married a man named Soichiro just so he can use his science skills to good use to experiment on that shit. How you may ask: By banging on the bed and popping two daughters to uses as test subjects to see which one would be a success when fussing the Fibers.

Shadow: Their oldest daughter who was a year old was a failure, so they tried again with their newborn infant second child who was also deemed a failure. Rather than hold the L and be a good mother, Ragyo decided to just... threw her away viewing her as nothing more than a test subject.

Wario: Whoa-ho-ho, talk about a piece of shit that woman is. Wait woman is barely giving a compliment cause she's not a human being at all.

Shadow: Fortunately for this child, Soichiro couldn't stand by Ragyo's decision and rescued her, assuming the name Isshin Matoi, and raised this daughter himself. Her name is Ryuko.

Wario: Yeah well things were alright but it didn't last long as Ryuko was just your average girl who didn't get along with her father and was one of those bullied kids turned gang thug and fighting people like a hobby. When she finally came home, she found dear old dad bleeding out, impaled by a... weird-looking sword.

Shadow: This was the first half of what would become her signature weapon, the Scissor Blades. In Isshin's last moments, he urged Ryuko to find whoever wielded the other half of the weapon, the one who killed him.

Wario: Ryuko didn't know at the time but the Scissor Blades were created by her father out of Life Fibers.

Shadow: They're actually one of the only weapons that can cut and destroy Life Fibers, which is important when your opponents are all using, y'know, Life Fibers.

Wario: With the quest of revenge and half a Scissor Blade, she started hunting down her father's killer. But she couldn't do it by herself, so she found a skimpy sailor suit to help her out. Yeah, here's that fanservice thing I was tellin' you about.

Shadow: This is Senketsu, a living suit made from Life Fibers, also known as a Kamui. Now, there's plenty of clothing out there made with some Life Fiber, but a Kamui like Senketsu is unique in that it's made of 100% Life Fiber, and yes, I said living suit.

Senketsu: Wait, Ryūko. These assassins can't hear me!

Cut to Senketsu being ironed.

Senketsu: Ohhh, that feels nice.

Wario:

Shadow: Not just anyone can wear Senketsu, as they have to successfully bond to him for the process to work. Lucky for Ryuko, she absolutely could, in no small part thanks to the Life Fibers infused within her body when she was an infant.

Wario: All that just so she can transform into her fanservice outfit.

Shadow: I mean that's kinda the whole point is it not?

Wario: Easy for you to say that's your favorite show. Now if you'll excuse I'm going to take a shot every time fanservice is around.

Shadow: Well you do you just don't die, Wario. Speaking of fanservice come back next time for Ryuko's opponent Masane Amaha.