nothing else but my heart's desire [COLLECTION] | FINISHED

Each day - ORIGINAL PROSE

A new day begins, though it brings with it the baggage of the night prior, for my eyes feel heavy still and my body aches, as does my heart and mind, for the world weighs on my spirit, as it chips away at the walls I have built to shield myself from the brutal, unforgiving, relentless force which is the world - piece by piece, little by little, one day at a time.

A new day?
Each day is the same.
A new sunrise?
I wish to return to slumber.
A new feeling it shall bring?
Some may call it hope, but only if I allow it, as my insides turn to rot, with anticipation of the day ahead.

But even as a day anew rises to greet me, even as my mind races with thoughts of all which could transpire between now and then, from the moment I open my eyes, to the moment I close them again, here I sit, still, as I write these thoughts and push on, for I must smile and greet the morning as all others do, to put my best foot forward, to feel what others feel, to lose myself in the beauty of the ordinary and mundane, to know what it means to be alive - messy, unapologetic, unhappy, ecstatic, lost, found, good, bad, ugly, beautiful, and everything else in-between.

Yesterday's gift?
A new moment to think and reflect, as I ready myself to leave for work.
To breathe and feel my heart beating?
A gift I shall (never) take for granted.
Today's tragedy?
It lasts for all eternity in a mind which remains stuck, stagnant, frozen as one (and all) version(s) of itself - never to change and always changing.

All I wish to do is rest/think/breathe.