Was It Fate/Joseph Quinn fan fiction

45. Just Need Time

AMARA POV

The next few days drag on for me. I got stitches in my arm thanks to the prick that grabbed me on Saturday and I have been on edge ever since. I talked to Joseph a few times but I haven't tried to call him. Ive been so shaken up I wanted to be alone and just not talk to anyone. Im confused and conflicted with my emotions at the moment and I feel overwhelmed with my anxiety getting to me once more. More than it has in a long time. My mind has been going over everything that happened this weekend and the more I think the more I feel like I need a break from everything. Im so confused and conflicted that its been driving me mad and I haven't been able to concentrate to much and I cant have that happen with my job. Life has gotten complicated thats for sure and im going to have to make a few decisions I might not want to make. But I feel I need time to think this over and work through my thoughts and feelings.

I reach for the my phone and see its only 10:23 on Tuesday. I groan and place my phone down then look back to my computer and get back to work. I had asked Joseph to come over today when I get off work. He wanted to make sure I was ok from what happened over the weekend and I needed to talk to him. The minutes tick by and I try to keep my mind on my work but memories of the attack this weekend keep popping up. While im lost in thought theres suddenly a knock on my door.

"Come in." I say looking up from my computer.

The door opens and in walks Ashley. She smiles at me shuts my door then sits at a chair by my desk.

"How are doing?" She asks me.
"As good as I can I be or maybe better then most. I don't know."
"Thats ok you have been through a lot. But anyway i wanted to ask if you going to come to lunch with me?"
I sigh and shake my head. "No im going to work through lunch."
Ashley looks at me and frowns. "You did that yesterday to."
"And?" I say raising an eyebrow at her.
Ashley sighs. "Alright ill see you in a bit then." She says with a smile then leaves my office and shuts the door.

I sigh and lean back into my chair and cover my face with my hands for a few moments then they drop to my lap and I lean forward and get back to work.

The afternoon goes just as slow as the morning I feel like I got nothing done but I know I did. Im going to have to double check it later I guess maybe I was on auto pilot or something. When five o'clock rolls around I close my laptop and grab my things. As im leaving my office Ashley comes up to me and smiles. I smile back and we head out of the office in silence and over to the bus stop.

The ride on the bus Ashley and I talk a little but she can tell im lost in my own thoughts. Im nervous about seeing Joseph and what im thinking of doing. I have no clue how this is going to go and my anxiety is starting to get to me it comes in waves and makes me feel sick i hate it. As soon as we get home and walk into the house I head upstarts and changed into some sweatpants and a tshirt throw my hair up and text Joseph im home. When he texts me that hes on the way my stomach knots up and I feel even more anxious. I head down stairs and grab myself a glass of wine to try and calm my nerves.

"You really going to do this?" I hear Ashley ask from behind me.
I turn around and frown at her. "Yeah." Is all I say and I take a sip of my wine and head into the living room to sit down.

Ashley sighs and fallows me over sitting right next to me. "Amara I....." She started to say but I cut her off.
"Ash I know I just need to do this ok im so overwhelmed that I just need space and time to think."
"Alright." She says offering me a sad smile. She pats my legs gets up and heads into the kitchen to make herself something to eat.

I just sit on the couch and drink my wine trying to calm down. It helps but not that much. Once I finish my glass the doorbell rings and my anxiety is back in full force. I set my glass down trying to get my hands to stop shaking and go to the door.