"So the game was to see who could hold me under the longest before I passed out" I dunk Mr. Quinn's head under once more, each time he goes under I hold him there for longer, knowing how your lungs burn, how your mind goes white, desperate for air but terrified of the water that will drown you if you dare to breathe.
I pull him out and again he gasps, attempting to pull as much air into his starved lungs as possible. I know in time the gasping will stop, the complete and utter fatigue will take over, he'll stop caring if I pull him out, start hoping that I don't so finally it will be over. I know every single thing he will be feeling because I have felt it.
"Pretty easy game when you consider I was 7 years old and they were grown men. Grown men preying on a vulnerable child... sound familiar Mr. Quinn?"
"I swear I won't, I'll never..."
He looks up at me and I see the tears in his eyes, remember the tears in my own as I begged my dad to stop, begged him to make it all stop and how they would just laugh
'Travis is going to cry'
'I'll give him something to cry about'
'His mother has him spoiled, has him soft as a bitch'
"I used to cry like you want to, and they would laugh at me. Did you laugh at Taylor today when she begged you let her out?"
I know he did, she told me he did, I dare him to deny it but he just nods his head
"I'm sorry"
"Not half as sorry as you're about to be" and I force him under once more, counting down the seconds the way I would count them down a 7 year old, held under water, counting the seconds until I could breathe again.
This time when I pull him out he only gasps a little and falls back against the wall and I turn so our faces are just inches apart
"Who are you thinking of right now?" I ask him, his eyes remain closed but I can tell by his quick breathing he's still with me "your mom? At first I would think of mine, beg her to come and stop what they were doing but my sister was just a baby so she and my mother would lock the bedroom door and pretend they couldn't hear it. Eventually I started thinking about an angel, a guardian angel I suppose, someone sent for me and only me to rescue me from my nightmare, to save me but they never came, I was always alone, always the one that no one gave a shit about" I grab his face in my hands, anger, real, pure, unadulterated anger stinging me for the first time tonight
"Travis!" He gulps out my name as spit slides over his lips and down his chin
"Until Taylor . She saw me, felt me, knew me and you tried to take her from me"
"No!"
"Tried to use me to hurt her"
"No!"
"You don't wait 11 years for someone to come into your life and then just sit back and watch as someone hurts them, I'm surprised you thought you would get away with this. I'm surprised it never once crossed that sick, twisted, deranged mind of yours that like father, like son" and with that I drag him back to the bath tub and shove his head under for the final time
*******************
Just as with Quinn's front door I find the Swifts no match for me either as I slip in to the front door and then silently move up the stairs.
The wooden landing creaks only once as I move over it and then into Taylors room, thankful but concerned that even after everything today she hadn't locked the door.
I don't know what I expected after her ordeal but I find her sat on the edge of her bed dressed in her pyjamas, both hands gripping her thighs and her eyes closed
"Taylor..." I whisper as I move towards her and for the first time notice the tears pouring down her face.
I kick off my shoes and slide onto the bed behind her, pulling her down to me by the shoulder and she doesn't object. She just places her head on my chest and wraps her arm around my waist holding me tight as her tiny body shakes against me
"You're safe" I inform her, knowing she will understand what I mean and she just grips me tighter and cries harder "he had to pay Taylor , there was no other way" I feel her nod against me
"Did you hurt him?"
"Not as much as I wanted to" she lifts my hand and looks at my knuckles which are clean "there are other, less obvious ways Taylor" again she nods as her arms return to my waist and I feel her crying begin to calm
"I'm sorry" she says again and I almost want to shake the words out of her so she never says them to me again
"I waited my entire life for you, no one tries to take you from me or hurts you without paying the consequences. Mr. Quinn just found that out the hard way"
"What are we going to do Travis? This is all such a mess"
"I don't know yet but whatever it is we do it together, always together"
"Promise it's you and me? Forever"
It doesn't even take me a heartbeat to answer "I promise... forever"
