Jahnnie Oneshots 3☆

☆Forgiveness☆

[ time to cry again :'). ]

TW: mental illness, heartbreak, alcohol and nicotine addiction

------------------------------------------------------------

Jake and Johnnie have been broken up for a while. They moved out so they don't live together anymore, and they're trying to push pass this.

But every night, they think about each other again.

Jake laid in his bed, tossing and turning. He couldn't stop thinking about Johnnie, the way he used to hold him, the way he used to kiss him. He missed everything about him, but he knew he had to move on.

Johnnie laid in his bed, his thoughts consumed by Jake. He missed his touch, his smile, and the way he made him feel. He wanted to call him, to tell him how much he missed him, but he knew it was over.

Jake gave up on sleep. He sits up in his bed. Ever since the breakup, he hasn't had his routine, he hasn't streamed or filmed a video.

He's just been alone.

Johnnie, too, couldn't sleep. He got up from his bed and decided to take a walk. He walked around the city, the streets empty and quiet. He couldn't stop thinking about Jake, the memories of
their time together flooding his mind.

Jake grabbed his phone, staring at Johnnie's contact. Tears clouded his vision. It won't hurt to just.. hear his voice.

He clicked the dial button, putting his phone on speaker. The ringing noise entered his empty bedroom.

Johnnie's phone started ringing. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked at the caller ID. He saw that it was Jake, and his heart skipped a beat. He hesitated for a moment before answering the call.

"Hello?"

"Hey," Jake spoke softly into the call. It's been.. months since they have called or texted. He's leaning forward, sitting on his bed. Bouncing his leg as he held the phone.

Johnnie's heart was racing as he heard Jake's voice. He missed it so much, but he was still hurt from the breakup.

"Hey," Johnnie said, trying to keep his voice steady. "Why are you calling?"

"I Miss You." Jake felt his voice shake as he says this, his hand shaking as it held the phone.

Johnnie's heart ached at Jake's words. He wanted to say the same thing, but he was scared of getting hurt again.

"I miss you too," Johnnie said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. "But we can't do this again. We can't keep hurting each other."

"I didn't mean it, baby." Jake said, his voice full of hurt. "I didn't mean to push you too far and push you away."

Johnnie felt tears welling up in his eyes as he heard Jake call him 'baby'. He missed that too, the way Jake would call him pet names and make him feel loved.

"I know you didn't," Johnnie said, his voice shaking. "But it still hurt. I can't keep doing this back and forth with you. I need something stable."

Jake felt his heart crack. "I am stable, please baby. We can work this out..!" He sounded so desperate.

The reason why they broke up, is because Jake has been heavily drinking and smoking and pushing his love away.

Johnnie's heart broke at the sound of Jake's desperation. He wanted to believe him, but he was scared of getting hurt again.

"You say that every time," Johnnie said, his voice strained. "But you always end up pushing me away again. I can't keep putting myself through that."

"I know, i know. I'm so sorry." Jake felt tears filling his eyes. "It won't happen again, Johnnie-baby."