I Think I'm in Trouble {Reimagined}

CVII.

"Steph, I brought Kristen up here---I'm gonna talk to my mom about some things to clear up any confusion before anything gets out of hand," Lindsey mentioned as soon as he pushed open the bedroom, knowing she was alone.

She nodded her head.

"Are you good? Do you want me to take the baby?" he wondered.

"We should be fine," she re-positioned her, eyes stiffly ahead as she went about the task.

It was then that Kristen recalled her being pretty tunnel vision at the funeral; it wasn't that she was in her own world, or simply avoiding people---she couldn't see and it was as clear as day now that she was looking at her.

"I'll be back in a bit," Lindsey disappeared, shutting the door behind him in order to meet up with his mother again.

"Stevie, I had no idea you were..." she lingered, unsure of what to say because she wasn't trying to be rude or cruel.

"Blind?" she smirked. "It is what it is for the time being..."

"It's temporary?" she wondered.

"Mhmm," she nodded. "Come sit down... The bed, the chair," she kind of gestured to her right, obviously aware of where her vanity chair was.

"Thanks..." she obeyed and took a seat. "I'm really sorry we haven't really had the opportunity to talk sooner. I know we're both struggling in our own ways and very differently at that, but I really am sorry..."

"I appreciate it," she sighed, fighting the very urge to let her guard down at all---she absolutely was not going to let herself breakdown into any kind of sadness. "I'm really sorry too."

Kristen nodded to herself, tears over the horizon as she averted gaze as though Stevie would be able to see it somehow.

It was clear to the singer by the sound of her silence that she was working on choking out some type of response and she didn't want to pressure her to do so.

"I know you and Jeffrey had planned to get married when he got back..." she sighed. "I'm so in my own sadness that it clearly caused me a shock, but most of all, I'm at a loss for words. Normally, it's my job as a writer to work through my feelings in order to advise others and this situation is just so different. If I weren't blind, maybe I would have talked on and on at the funeral, given that I would have written pages and pages in my journal. It's just what I do in times of chaos; it's my outlet and without vision, I can't necessarily write and use my words like I do..."

"I don't think anybody expects that from you, not this time..."

She nodded.

Kristen then let off a wince.

By the sound, Stevie couldn't exactly tell if she was in pain or trying to collect herself from having begun crying.

"Let's switch subjects a little, I really don't want to cry anymore," she kind of grasped her lower stomach, appreciative of the fact that the woman couldn't see her to worry.

The older blonde remained silent.

"First, Lily is beautiful..." she was sure to mention. "I'm sure she brings a lot of smiles around here these days."

"That's for sure." The very mention of her daughter instantly brought a smile to the woman's lips only because all she could do was envision her beautiful face; how precious she was.

"I'm really excited to have the baby, but I'm also terrified... I'm not good with pain normally."

Stevie smirked, "It's one of those things that is so painful at the moment, but once it's over, it's really over and you just get over it..." she arched her brow, going back in time once more to simply recall how excruciating it was having Jeffrey; her first birth, her first child, everything from the pain to her nerves along with both her and Lindsey's bad attitude that day. "Jeffrey was my first born..."