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~ Review 72 - City of Love by rainbowxstars ~

City of Love by rainbowxstars
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Reviewed by katrina12234

Cover: 9.5/10
The cover is good. It could be improved, but it is really good.

Blurb: 6.5/10
I feel that the blurb is a bit too short. It's not capturing the reader's attention the way a blurb is supposed to. I would suggest re writing it.

Writing Style:
The story is written in third person. The first chapter is the only one written in first. I would suggest either change it to third so that it is more consistent or at least indicate in the second chapter that the narrative changed to third person. It took me a while to realize the narrative changed and when it did hit me, I was very confused.

Flow and Pace:
The pace is nice, but for some reason the flow felt a bit interrupted. I wasn't able to imagine the scenes properly. I would suggest to maybe try adding more descriptions in certain areas. And, also, in the dialogues, just try to add some depth to them. Don't just make the characters say the words. Add the emotion to it. Remember, the reader won't understand what the character is saying unless the author themselves makes the reader feel what is happening.

Character:
The characters are well-written. Though, I would suggest adding a little more descriptions to each of them so that the reader can visualise them. Even if it's a fan fiction. It's necessary for a person who may have never seen the character before to be able to visualise them even without the pictures.

Plot:
The plot is lovely, a soft romance set in the city of love.

Grammar:
There are quite a few grammar errors in the form of unnecessary words being put into the sentence. I would suggest re reading it and editing it.

Also, when you have an expression, the character does. Try writing it in the form "Are you following me?" I gasped. "Oh my gosh, you are following me!" instead of writing it "are you following me gasp, you are following me." It disrupts the flow of the reader.

Overall:
Overall, I would suggest maybe adding more description to the chapters to add depth. Maybe edit the chapters for grammar as well. I would also suggest maybe adding some hook or some character development to the book, since I found it all going in the same tone, making the book very monotonous, making it hard to stay hooked.

Overall, the plot and the book is really good. It has a lot of potential to be a good Romance book. It just needs a few twists and to be a bit more descriptive.

Thank and I do hope you take the feedback positively and not negatively. The book was really good but as a reviewer, I was paying extra attention to details to help improve. 😊