MS. ANTIPATIKA

CHAPTER 51

A/N:

Sorry sa mahabang paghihintay, marami lang ginagawa at mas priority pero ito na ako oh, ito na! Ito na! Aaaaaahhhhh! Dubi-dubido! Ay! Good luck nga pala sa mag-eexam this year, bar exam man yan for teacher test, for lawyer test, for med test or for lab test. Ay nasali! Good luck po sa inyo! May test din kaya ang pagiging contractor? Charizz! Hindi tayo magiging crocs!
Well anyways ito na siya!
Enjoy reading!⚠️⚠️

Lingering Feelings

SHANA'S POV

She was in deep sleep in my bed. Lying sweetly and carefree in her stomach. Facing me with her back with nothing much to see but the tense and the product of the painful event of her life.

I was just standing at the window while watching her sleep, thinking about what happened to us. How everything collapsed in my face. After I learned about everything it such a shame that I let her hand go and let everything destruct us. I let the enemy decide for us and I'm so regretful that I'm swayed by weakness.  I know I could fight for her and be there to help her instead of another woman she's being with right now.

I feel ashame of myself for throwing myself to another woman too just to forget the memories that I have with her just because she said so. In fact she is moving on with her life but I'm still number one in her heart, so obvious in her actions but still, I am battling with jealousy. Because how did she make it looks like she had it handled.

I'm the one who's kissing her lips and smiled after. Saying good things with each other. Having dates. Trying to capture every minute for a forever memories and promises. We'll be at our wits end but still we hold each other and never let go because we know we can conquer it all.

I weep a bit and as I feel my lips tremble I covered it because I don't want to wake her up. Just keeping my pain for myself.

The event last night was such amazing if it meant to be forever but I think it would be just for a moment. A moment to forget.

Only a moment.

I planned to be updated about her life because I'm still worried about her but her words stuck through me so I take her advice and live with my life the way she wants not thinking of her but I kinda regret it because you know, look what happened to her.

If I just didn't listen to her and still help her she won't look like this and she won't be diagnosed with anxiety and depression. She'll be probably as gullible as she is just like before, attending schools and having her career blossoms in her hands.

But I seem to care to what is happening too, the boxes, the black mask, it stops because I distance myself from her. Momentarily being away with her helps everything to calm down.

I'm a bit agitated. I blame myself and half of it is I'm right with my decision but right now I'm willing to be hurt again and again  but I won't leave her side. She needed me. I want her back. I don't know if she wanted me back too but I'm willing to court her again.

I still love her.

The struggle that she's been through is not that easy. Jappy was literally work then her, her then work, she is a good mother indeed and the asshole who have the nerve to kidnap his own daughter has the audacity to hurt her. I can't believe I let him be a father to chipmunk. He's so pathetic to let that happen to her own daughter. She wasted aways chipmunk's trust.

That also is one of my mistakes which I would like to pay to chipmunk. I know it wouldn't be easy for her because she already trusted the man but I know for sure, she must hate him more now.