Winter Hearts

Turning Point

Leo saw her eyes were dark with worry, her upturned face close to his. He finally managed to inhale, deeply, catching her scent, a mixture of her delightful shampoo and fresh sweat.

He felt his breath catch in his throat, and he let out a gasp. She sat up in alarm, looking down at him.

"Can you breathe?" She laid a hand on his chest, then pulled it away abruptly, moving it instead to his arm to help him sit up. He nodded brusquely, resting his arms on his bent knees as he coughed before lifting his head to look up at Hongbin.

She looked up at Panos, "Oh god, I've cracked his rib or something!"

"You okay, hyung?" Leo wondered that Hongbin finally had the decency to look concerned. He nodded. He went to get up, and found the boys' arms encircling his own immediately.

"Siana, you should consider a career in American football. Or MMA," joked Panos as Hongbin and Siana helped Leo up. Leo disengaged immediately, feeling embarrassed by the fuss. He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes cast down.

"Are you okay?" he murmured to Siana, who was scowling at Panos. She looked up to him, her face softening into a small shy smile.

"I'm fine. I didn't even touch the ground thanks to you," Her gaze rested on his chest for a moment before she looked back up at him. "Sorry about that. I didn't expect this big lug to get in my way," she said, giving Panos the dagger eyes.

Leo unconsciously stepped back as Siana reached out to put a hand on his arm. He saw her immediately withdraw her hand in shock, her eyes going from worried to disappointed. She clasped her hands together, unsure of what to do.

Hongbin looked at Leo in surprise.

"It was an accident, hyung," he said placatingly, smiling at Siana. Panos stepped forward between them.

"It was my fault, I knew she was there but I lost my balance."

"No, no, I was too aggressive, I should have let it go." Siana almost whispered.

Leo felt a flare of anger light up inside of him. He felt angry with himself that he couldn't keep upright when she bumped into him, that it had taken him so long to recover. Angry that he had lain there unconsciously holding Siana tight while the others had teased them. Angry that he had recoiled from her because he didn't want to be pitied. Which she wasn't doing, anyway. Angry that everyone thought he was angry - and it was only so because of his own reluctance to explain himself.

And he felt even more angry that she felt she had to apologise for being aggressive in a game of basketball. He could handle aggression on the court, why couldn't he handle this feeling he had?

He could see the weight of tension in the air, all because everyone was waiting to see his response. He felt put on the spot, and irritated that he couldn't instantly find it within himself to put her at ease. He looked to Hongbin, who was staring at him with his head cocked to one side, and remembered what he had said earlier.

He made a concerted effort to relax himself, easing the frown off his face. He As a sportsman, he instinctively knew what he had to say to her. He shook his head and smiled down at her.

"No, you must never let it go. Don't be sorry for going for it. I just... didn't expect you to be so... strong," he mumbled in embarrassment.

Hongbin laughed, clearly relieved. Leo felt the tension dissipate immediately.

Panos let out a dramatic gasp. 

"Did you hear that? He called you heavy," he stage-whispered out of the side of his mouth to Siana. He pursed his lips like a drag queen as he raised an eyebrow at her.

She stage-whispered back, "Are you deaf? He called me a go-getter." 

She crinkled up her eyes as she smiled up at Leo, relieved and happy to hear his words.

Leo felt an indescribable relief that he had been able to allay her fears that she had hurt or offended him, and was pleased to see her smiling up at him so warmly. He wondered what it was that had him so tied up in knots that he could create such a tense situation, and realised it was his own self-consciousness, not wanting to look silly, or weak. 

In the end what mattered most was that nobody was hurt, and that Siana didn't feel she had caused him harm or offence. He saw Hongbin smiling, and realised having him talking in his ear gently about his predicament had been of great help to him. He was grateful that there were people in his life who, when they saw him having trouble, would step up and help him in one way or another.

He was surprised by how easy it had been for him to change the tone of the situation. He should have done this earlier.

He heard a short beep and turned to see their mini bus pull up on the street.

Ken had wound down a window and poked his head out. He was smiling that cute smile that made his eyes shine.

He called out to them to get in the bus for the ride home. Panos picked up the ball and shook Hongbin and Leo's hands, then leaned in for a hug and a wet kiss on the cheek for Siana. She pushed him away in disgust, cursing at him in Greek.

Hongbin and Leo turned to Siana to invite her to take the bus home with them. She shook her head, gesturing to the bike, which she had to ride home.

"I'm very cold all of a sudden. Maybe Leo hyung can walk with you," Hongbin said, practically over his shoulder as he sprinted for the bus. He shut the door and sat down, pulling Ken back from the window and shutting it before he could insist on joining them for a walk too.

Leo and Siana watched in silence as the bus pulled away and headed back to their home.

He felt a tug of emotions, being happy to have some time alone with Siana, and feeling abandoned at the same time. He laughed at himself. He wasn't a schoolboy anymore, and it wasn't as if he couldn't hold his own in a conversation.

He looked down at her as she tidied her hair and tucked it into her hoodie as she pulled it up. The evening chill was starting to set in, and they were still slightly sweaty from play. She picked up her jacket and slipped it on, then walked over to the bike, unhooking the pedal from the kerb and turning to look at him with a smile.

"You hungry?" she asked, her eyes bright.