The Guide To Being Transgender

Oh, Allies, Our Allies

This is directed at allies and people who have friends or family that are transgender or gender non-conforming.

First off, let's tackle the subject of pronouns. If someone tells you they like gender-neutral pronouns, don't say it's not grammatically correct or try to object. Accept it and try your hardest to get used to associating that person with those pronouns. If you mess up, politely correct yourself and move on.

That brings me to the next topic: properly correcting pronoun use. If you're the one who messes up, don't make a big deal of it. Just correct yourself quickly and then keep talking. If it's someone else, shoot your trans friend a look to decipher if they want you to correct it. If they do, by all means, go ahead. But if they don't or if they aren't even there, don't correct it because you could potentially be outing them in an unsafe circumstance. That's not cool, even if you're a really close and protective friend to them.

Don't ask invasive questions either. If it's something you wouldn't ask a cisgender person, don't ask it of a trans person. If you wouldn't feel comfortable answering a question, don't talk about it with a trans person. Just because they're a minority doesn't mean you can be rude.

And finally for now, offer them the support and reassurance they need. Don't act annoyed when they bring up a trans topic. Listen to them and let them rant their little hearts out; I'm sure they'd do the same for you.

Also, as an ally, remember that trans people aren't perfect. Douchebags exist in the community as well. If a trans person is being rude, feel free to call them out on it in a polite way. If they continue to be rude, just ignore them and don't give them the attention they desire.

That's all I have to say, anyway. Feel free to take my advice; or don't, I don't own you.