The Guide To Being Transgender

Preferred... Parking? Seating?

What exactly are preferred pronouns? What is a preferred name?

I don't know about you, but my name is not preferred. My pronouns are not preferred. My livelihood isn't a preference. It isn't a parking spot that I try to get but simply back off from when I don't get it.

My pronouns ARE he/him/his. My name IS Macks. That isn't a preference. That just is.

I hate the term preferred pronouns, because it implies that our chosen name and pronouns aren't always valid. It implies that a person should use them at their convenience, and diminishes the importance of proper pronoun/name usage.

He/him/his are not my preferred pronouns. They are the only pronouns that can be used in reference to me correctly. Using she/her after I've explicitly stated my pronouns is disrespectful. Even using they/them to refer to me after I've told you what my pronouns are is disrespectful.

Pronouns are a human right created by our binary-biased society. When I tell someone my pronouns, it is not a request. It is a command.

I hate the term preferred because it's only used in relation to trans people. We don't call cis people's pronouns preferred. They're just their pronouns, easy as pie. So why, then, are they suddenly preferred pronouns when talking about us?

My pronouns are he/him/his. Not my preferred pronouns. No other pronoun can be used to refer to me, because any other pronoun would be incorrect. It would be like walking into a coffee shop and referring to the cis girl behind the counter with he/him pronouns, even after she's IDed herself as a cis girl.

All of this goes for my name as well. My name is Macksimillion Liam Topinka. It is not what shows up on my birth certificate or legal documents, but that is soon going to change. My name is not {birth name}. I don't know who you're talking about if you use that name.

So my name and pronouns are not preferred. You may agree or disagree. Maybe you have something to add or your own opinion that you'd like to state. Feel free to put it all in the comments. I love reading everything y'all say.

I hope this was helpful or entertaining or something. Goodbye, guys!