The Guide To Being Transgender

Transphobia

Obviously, dealing with transphobia is a big part of being trans. It's hard at first, and it can get to you if you let your guard down. You just have to learn how to appropriately deal with it.

First off, don't engage the transphobe if you don't have to. It fuels their idiocy. If you do have to engage them, whether for your own sake or someone else's, you should be short about it. Shut them down in two sentences or less, if possible, and keep it quiet. Just be aware that, having engaged them, they will probably start to tease and make fun of you more. They'll want to piss you off, because they think it's funny. Don't let them piss you off.

If the transphobe does target you and you really can't take it, talk to someone. If you're in school, go to a counselor. If you're in work, go to a manager. There's always someone who can help.

Now lets touch on a topic that a lot of people don't think is a thing. Transphobia in the trans community. It exists, and it's hard to deal with. I know a few trans people who are transphobic.

One of my closest friends believes that you can't truly be trans if you don't present that way. For example, I'm a trans boy, but I wear a dress. This friend doesn't think I'm really trans. They also don't believe in most nonbinary identities. In fact, they kind of pick and choose what to believe in as it becomes convenient to them, and it gets on my nerves.

To deal with someone like that, you should take care not to undermine their views. Politely inform them of your views and start a peaceful debate. It can help open their eyes if you bring up the fact that those people just want to be comfortable with themselves, just like you, and we have no right to tell them otherwise. Trans people are more likely to see the point in that argument.

Now, here are some common arguments against trans people, and how you can refute them.

- "Transgender is a mental illness."
Refute: "Actually, it was classified as a mental illness, just like homosexuality, but research and experiments have shown us that it actually isn't, since it isn't primarily influenced by neurotransmitters or hormones. It was reclassified quite some time ago."

- "You were prettier as a girl."
Refute: "Thank you for the observation, but seeing as I was never a girl, I'm not entirely sure who you're referring to." (This can work for trans girls as well, just change the gender term.)

- "You can't be a boy and like girly things."
Refute: "Actually, lots of boys enjoy girly things. The parameters of what classifies as girly or manly are very skewed in this day and age."

- "You can't change who you are."
Refute: "I'm not."

- "You can't alter your chromosomes, so you'll always be (insert birth sex here)."
Refute: "That refers to sex; I'm talking about gender. By definition, they are two very different things that just happen to align in most people. I'm not trying to change my chromosomes, but it could do you some good to do a bit of research. There's more than just XX and XY, anyways."

Trust me, those are just the baseline arguments people try to throw out. I could go on for ages.

If you're ever dealing with transphobia and need someone to talk to, I'd be happy to help out as much as I can. My kik is kellabellawuzhere if you ever want to talk about anything, or just to be friends lol

Good luck, and I hope this helped!