What If love is real

68.

I'm so happy about the 4K readers, Thank you so much .

 Its almost the end of the story and If you noticed I'm trying to update everyday. 

I don't know about you - But this Chapter made me cry so much . 

I want to dedicate this chapter to my sweet sister  Aichafaqih who supported me through this whole story, I wanted to give up many time because I only have two or three regular Readers but she kept saying it was good And as long as I enjoy writing its fine and also , also to Zaynie_Sunshine who always votes and read every week . Many thanks to all the others <3 

Please Keep supporting <3 

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My body felt numb when I wanted to move, I stayed crawled for a long moment drowning in my own pain. Thinking about all the possible ways this all could be just a horrible nightmare and I will wake up in the arms of the one I love ,kissing his cheek ...

An irritated cough interrupted my dreamy thoughts.

When I finally managed to stood up, his built body was standing in front my sight. Despite my deep pain, I couldn't bare not to stare at the popping veins through the clear skin of his neck, the white long sleeved shirt barely covered the ink on his  chest.

I turned on the lights to get a better sight at his messy yet amazing hair, his hazel eyes uneasy looking around .. The way his white front teeth bit on his thin lower lip made the butterflies grown in my stomach.

I smiled at how stupid I look staring at somebody's property while I just met the worst nightmare of my life. The bad boy who haunted me for nights and I'm here daydreaming about Zayn. But I can't help it, I know deep down that this won't be the last time Nate will show up for me .. starting from this night, my days will be much worser and my life will get messier Knowing that Zayn will not be around, no one will be around.

"Will you ever answer me ?" His mainly voice made me snap back to reality
" I'm sorry, I didn't heard what you said"
" Tell me again ? " his voice was insistent
" Tell you what ? " I asked in confusion
" About that night " He continued " The night when everything happened "
" What are you talking about Zayn? " I said scanning his clenched fists , Till now that I noticed the dark circles under his eyes, how angry he looks.

" Tell me what happened between you and that Nate ! Tell me everything again .. " He was yelling this time. My mind was empty, Not correctly processing what he said. 

As I stayed calm not sure what's with him and why he wants to hear this story again. He knew that its painful and hurts every time I tell it again , Ii feels fresher and the wounds turn back to life. 

 He was in a rush pacing in front of me, And sighing multiply

" Tell me now " He demanded , his face so close to mine.
" Why ? I don't understand. Why again ?" I answered trying to keep my low temper, My eyes stings as I fought for the tears to not fall down. I'm already in pain and hurt from what I lived earlier, I can't take more.

" And why not ? I mean you already told me . Why won't you repeat it again ... " He insisted , getting closer to me - I automatically stepped  back.
" Why would I ? I don't want to .. Not now, I don't want to talk about it " I snapped

Why is everyone bringing back the past , why am I living this again. For god's sake I just met Nate!

" Tell me Please Sandra " He screamed at my face, he stopped my pacing with his firm hand grip on my arm. The veins on his neck looks so green under his white skin, they could just blow up at any moment
" Zayn you are scaring me ! " My voice came out as a whine , A tear escapes my eye and I sniff.

He sighed deeply and ran his perfect hand in his hair. His other hand is still on my arm tight and unmoving, I felt my skin burning under his grip but I couldn't move away. Once that first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. 

"Why won't just tell me, Are you afraid of saying something wrong ... Or adding something untold to this dramatic story" his words were like poisoned arrows .

I didn't understand or I didn't want to understand, it was just crazy hearing the person I loved and trusted the most saying those awful words.

" Zayn, you are just angry and you don't really mean it right " I was still hoping that he will take back what he said
" I mean every word I said " He put pressure on the word and on my hand.
I couldn't help but let the tears fall.

" Let go of me " I screamed
" Not till you tell me " He yelled back
" Zayn it hurts let go and get out right now "
" I knew it, Your friend was right " He removed his hand away from my arm, I felt back on the couch in disbelief
" I'm so stupid, I fucking loved you and it was all a game for you ... You enjoyed this while I suffered for you. I was in pain for days and willing to kill the bastard who did this to you " Zayn shout at my crying face.

" What ? What game and what friend ? "
" Your best friend Melanie I met her back in LA and she told me everything!!! " He said with a #your-busted look on his face but I couldn't quite keep up with him. Mel and Zayn in La and game.
" Zayn I swear I don't know what you're talking about. " I was still  sitting on the couch, my word barely understandable behind my loud sobs.

" What did she tell you ? " 

" Everything, from how you plan those stories to how you make those boys fall for you, that Nate is your best friend's boyfriend how can you ? YOU ARE SICK SANDRA " He yelled disgust in his eyes. 

" No, This is all a lie or misunderstanding . I don't know but its not right Zayn " I never saw him in this state, his face was red from anger, his eyes were blood shot instead of the clear hazel color, his fists were clenched and he even tried to hit me with his hand when he wanted me to tell again.

" Shut up Sandra " He yells and turned around, his boots were hard against the floor but couldn't cover my loud yelling for him and crying
" And don't you ever come anywhere near me " He turned warning with his finger pointed at me. 

What is wrong with my life?   What did I do wrong to those who keep treating me so badly.       Lea, Mel, Nate, and now Zayn . How could Melanie told him that, she can't do that to me, he probably misunderstood, he was always being so jealous and easily gets angry. Maybe he just 

I found my self bended on my knees , my face up looking at him . I was pitiful, hurt but the most surprising thing is his face. he was looking differently at me, not the same loving eyes even after we fought he never looked at me this way. HE WAS DONE LOVING ME !! 

I screamed, yelled louder and louder than my throat could handle, I crawled in my place and cried my heart out. I was feeling more painful now even more when Nate rapped me. Pain was terrible it felt like a sharp-toothed creature eating me from the inside . I gather my strength and stood up, the tears haven't stopped falling blurring my sight. My little finger hit the corner of the glass table , most awful pain but the pain in my heart was even more that I didn't care.  

I spent hours crying and screaming alone , my voices echoed in the big house. I was hopping for someone to appear and help me move on, comforts me. I was wishing to wake up anytime from this awful nightmare. But as the hours passes I knew this is true and happening. I lost Zayn, forever. 

As my mind started believing the mere truth, I started to get thirsty and my throat hurt . My only remedy is Jane's secret room . Without thinking, I hurried crushing everything on my way. 

" Please don't be closed " I whispered to my self trying to open the room . 

I sighed in relief when the click sound of the open door happened, I took the first bottle I could find on the selves , fought to open it. I took a first sip without hesitation 

I was craving, it feels like heaven when my tongue met the sweet and sour familiar taste of drink. My throat was burning but it was a good and satisfying feeling . I smile at how the pain began fading as soon as I gulp the whole bottle and fought my drunk body to get up and take the second one.