Marvels Of Fate

Love Lost Once More

After I told Harry that I didn't have our baby killed, he didn't say a word to me throughout the drive. Even when we reached home, Harry parked the car and just exited. I don't understand why he's behaving in this manner. I mean, yeah it's unexpected; having a child wasn't on my agenda either. However, now that I am pregnant, we have to face the circumstances and not run away from them. I get out of the car and make my way inside.

Harry is nowhere in sight. I look for him in the lounge, kitchen and guest bedroom. However, all those rooms are empty.

"Fuck!" Harry hisses, and something bangs upstairs. Hurriedly, I make my way upstairs. I stop in the doorway of our room, a small gasp escaping my lips at the destruction that Harry has caused.

"What're you doing?" I yell, as Harry tosses over the floor lamp. It sparks as the plug gets yanked out of the socket. My hand flies up to my mouth, as I jump back. "Stop it!" Harry kicks at the lamp, his boot's toe tearing through the shade. I step over broken glass, keeping a safe distance between us for good measure though. Now I have to think of my child's safety as well as mine.

"Harry, stop. Please," I beg. Harry kicks at the lampshade again and then he suddenly swivels, facing me.

"We were so fucking careful!" Harry yells. "How could this happen?!" I'm stunned by his harsh tone and enraged eyes.

"H-Harry," I stutter. "It's not that big of a deal. We are having a child, you should be happy." I try to offer Harry a small smile. "Isn't this what you always wanted?"

"No!" Harry grabs my forearms and shakes me. "No, Mus. No!" I'm scared of the man in front of me. For once in my life, I don't fear Harry's anger towards another, but myself. I wriggle in his grip, and he releases me. "It was never part of our plan!"

"But we're also getting married. It'll work out," I say. Harry shakes his head.

"No! That thing," Harry's eyes flit toward my stomach disgustedly. "Is not part of our plan and won't be for years to come." I take a step back.

"I'm not going to abort my child - our child." I say sternly. "And if you can't accept that, then I'm sorry." I turn around, stepping over all the broken furniture.

"So what? You're gonna let it live?" Harry yells from behind me. I stop in the doorway and turn around.

"Yeah," I nod my head. "It's our baby, by the way. Please show him some respect."

"It's a boy, eh?" Harry questions, rolling his eyes. I shrug my shoulders.

"I would like to think so," I smile to myself at the thought. Harry flicks his wrist at me, silently telling me to leave. I oblige because there's no point in talking to this man right now.
*******
"Yes, I didn't want kids before." I tell Kate, as I seat myself on one of the loungers outside. "But knowing that a baby is growing inside of me - made from Harry and my love - I want him in this world. I need him with me."

"I'm so happy for you, Mus." Kate says sincerely. "You can come here for the duration of your pregnancy and even after that, you're welcome here. You know that, right?"

"Yeah," I murmur. "But I can't do that to Liam and you. Especially since you now have a family to look after."

"Bullshit, Mus! Any house of mine is yours," Kate says. "Let Harry be a dick. His loss." I almost smile at her words, but I can't bring myself to feel happy even though I want to be; I should be. This should be one of the best days of my life, but it isn't. Harry is to blame for it.

"Yeah, indeed." I stare at my palms. "But no, I'll stay here and find a flat near the publishing house. Don't worry about me Kate. I've handled myself before and I can do it again."

"Mus...I know I can't talk you out of anything that you've set your mind to," Kate sighs. "But please keep in mind that you're always welcome here."

"I can't move again," I huff. "It's too much of a hassle for me. Thanks though, I'll keep it in mind."

"I'll be beside you though," Kate exclaims. "During your last semester and labor." I grin at the thought.

"That would be great," I agree. "After all, what would my little one do without his godmother?"

"He?" Kate questions, and I can feel her grinning.

"Yeah, I'm having a boy." I nod to myself contentedly. "Or so I'd like to think."

"I'm going to email you diet plans, books and everything you need in order to take out a healthy babe." Kate's tone is bubbling with excitement.

"Can't wait," I say. "You're gonna be my only guiding light, Kate. Thank you." I mean every word of it and I hope she understands just how much I appreciate her efforts.

"No problem," crying erupts in the background. "I've gotta go, Mus. Bye." My best friend ends the call hastily. I place my phone on my stomach and pick up the packet of Barbecue Lays chips that's lying beside me. God, I've been dying to eat these since morning. I take out a handful and shove it into my mouth greedily.

"You're turning me into a pig." I murmur, through a mouthful to my baby. I hear the sliding door open behind me and boots thud against the wooden floor. Harry steps over beside me and crouches beside my chair. I glance at him through the corner of my eye and then hastily divert my gaze back to the pool.

"Mus, can we talk?" Harry asks, placing his hands on the arm rest. I keep chewing, trying to transport myself back to La La Land. "I know I acted like a complete dick back then...I was taken by surprise." By head snaps in the direction of my irrational fiance.

"And I wasn't?" I demand. I shove my finger at my chest. "Harry, I was as shocked as you were. But you didn't see me blowing up and destroying every fucking piece of furniture that we owned. Right?" Harry diverts his gaze to the ground, pursing his lips together.

"I get that I was out of place. I'm ready to talk now though." I scoff.

"Oh, that's convenient." Harry places his hand over mine. I let mine rest underneath his, basking in the warmth that his soft palm provides me.

"Mus, yes you are the carrier of it, but I am the father. I have an equal say on what happens to it," Harry begins. "And I don't want it. Just think about how it'll affect our lives. Do you really want that?"

"Just the fact that you're referring to our baby as an 'it' proves your insensitivity." I slide my hand out from Harry's and place it in my lap.

"Mus, why don't you fucking get it? I don't want this child," Harry's tone is getting higher by the second. "And since I have a part in making this mistake, I think that I should have a say in whether it gets to live or not." I get off the lounger, having heard enough. "Listen to me!" I ignore Harry and make my way into the house. However, just before shutting the door behind me, I turn around and face Harry.

"From now onwards you don't have any responsibility towards my child, or me." I state sternly. "This is my life and my child, who I will bring into this world. No one else gets a say in this." I slam the sliding door shut and head for the front door. I need out right now. I fear if I spend another second in this place right now then I'll be led to do something I'll regret later on.

The minute I step out of the house a sob wracks my body and I realize that tears of anger and hurt are ready to rush down my cheeks. I rush behind a concrete pillar and let it all out; the tears, the sobs, and the realization that once more I've lost the man I love.