Marvels Of Fate

I'm A Scumbag

Harry's POV

"Liam, I'm fucking all right! Can you please just sign the goddamn discharge papers so we can leave?" I yell, frustrated.

"The doc needs to see you one last time before we leave, Harry. Be patient." Liam says, his tone bloody calm, and his composure collected. How the heck does he remain in this cool state with me annoying the hell out of him? If only I could get on his nerves this whole process would speed up.

"Then call the fucking man, Liam!" I grab the tissue box off the side table and chuck it at him. Liam moves to the side at the last minute, so it hits him on the arm. Liam flips me off.

"You're a dick, you know that? A real dick." I make a face at him, just as his phone begins to ring. Liam raises his index finger at me, silently excusing himself. I throw my head back against the headboard and stare at the ceiling. Stupid drunk drivers. Can't they just call a bloody Uber and save people like me from useless hospital runs? Liam comes rushing back in and waves his arm frantically.

"Get the fuck up!" Liam yells, his eyes full of panic.

"What? What happened?" I question, alarmed.

"Mus has gone into labor," Liam grabs the bag of medicines and holds the door open. "Fuck your health, I need to be there with her. Are you coming?" I'm already on my feet, halfway towards the door.

"No shit, Sherlock!" I exclaim, as we race down the hallways. "But it's her 8th month, right?"

"I'm sorry to break it to you, but babies don't come announced." Liam and I step out onto the pavement. "Shit, I don't have my car because Sarah took it with the kids. We have to run."

"Which hospital is she in?" I ask, as we gain speed and zoom through the London streets.

"The one that's four blocks from here, I forgot the name." Liam and I both push through the pedestrians. I'm sure I've never run this fast in my entire life.

"And now you're worried about her," Liam says.

"Now is not the time to give me an I-told-you-so lecture," I hiss.

"Okay, then, I'll spare you for now." By the time we reach the hospital, I'm completely out of breath and I strongly believe that adrenaline is the only thing that is keeping me on my feet. Both of us barge through the hospital doors, and head over to the receptionist.

"Where are...the emergency labor rooms?" I manage to wheeze out, leaning against the desk. The receptionist gives me a funny look, and points toward a hallway.

"Make a left from there," she instructs. I nod my head, and yank Liam by the jacket.

"I wonder if the babies are out yet," I say. Liam laughs.

"Harry, she's giving birth, not finishing up her food. Of course they aren't born yet!" Liam exclaims, as we come to a stop outside the labor room. Kate is pacing in front of the door, arms crossed across her chest. Relief washes over her features when she sees us two.

"Thank God you both are here," Kate says. "I was waiting for you, Harry. Let's go and get changed into scrubs. Mus is still getting prepped - some complication regarding the baby's position. Only her doctor can do the delivery, and she's on her way."

"Okay, let's." I say, bending over, and placing my hands on my knees. As the adrenaline washes off, a stinging pain shoots up my side. I lower my gaze to my body, my eyes widening as they land on my abdomen. I'm bleeding, fuck! The stitches must have opened because of all that running. My shoe feels tight as well. Oh God, my foot must be swelling up like the doc said.

"Harry, you're bleeding!" Kate exclaims all of a sudden. I nod my head, grimacing.

"Yeah, but that's not important right now." I say, taking hold of her arm. "Let's go, Kate." She refuses to budge, cocking an eyebrow at me.

"You're bleeding and it isn't a big problem? Really, Harry?" Kate places her hands on her hips and stares at me adamantly. "You need to see a doctor right now."

"No!" I exclaim, a little too loudly. "I need to be with Mus right now. Don't worry, I'll just re-bandage this." Kate looks at me warily, and then finally nods her head.

"Fine! I'll head go and get changed, you can follow after bandaging yourself." Kate tells me, marching off towards a room. I mentally take a note of the door, and rush towards the pharmacy.
********
After hastily re-bandaging myself and changing into scrubs, I made my way back where Kate and Liam were anxiously pacing the halls. Now, we're all waiting for a nurse to come and tell Kate and I to head into the labor room, where Mus' delivery will take place.

"Why isn't she here yet?" I ask impatiently, jumping on the balls of my feet. Kate offers me an empathetic smile.

"She'll be here, Harry. Deliveries are big deals," Kate says. "We have a long night ahead of us." Pouting, I chew into yet another fingernail.

"Ha, now you know what I went through when Kate had her delivery." Liam teases, grinning. I don't even have the right state of mind to argue with him, or fire back. "You know what?" He gets up and joins me, placing his hand on my shoulder. "Just breathe and toss this question over in your mind; why are you so anxious about Mus right now, when you weren't there for her for 9 whole months?" Liam smiles at me, his gaze ever friendly. "I want an answer so think fast." His question has delivered quite a blow to my mind. Why am I so concerned about Mus...and our baby? Oh my Lord, I am concerned for our child!

The realization that I helped make that baby just hits me, like a huge bulldozer. He is a part of my flesh and blood. I have helped create him, alongside Mus. He's gonna be a part of her family, my family - our family. He's my child! I don't understand but the thought didn't quite make me happy months ago, but right now, standing here - as I anticipate his arrival - I can feel the excitement bubbling in my veins. I missed out on such a great experience because I thought he wasn't part of the plan. Because I...I thought his arrival is untimely. What an asshole I am!

My ego, my immature way of thinking, made Mus go through all that herself. The doctor's appointments, the books, the new sensations...Lord, I feel like crap. I tortured her in the first few months by playing the tv too loud, keeping the music on full volume, calling my friends over late at night and so many other bloody stupid incidents that I want to erase. I'm...a dick. I deserve to be slapped a hundred times in a row. Heck, I don't even expect Mus to forgive me now. I want to go to her side and just beg, and beg until she grants me her forgiveness, but I don't deserve it. I'm a scumbag! I'm everything I feared and didn't wanna become. I used to promise myself I'd be a great father and partner for my better half...I failed. I failed miserably and I can't seem to find even a peephole for redemption. I bury my face in my hands and let out a muffled yell.

"I believe I've got an answer," Liam says. I look up at him and shake my head in disbelief at myself.

"Yeah, me too. Unfortunately, it's too late." I say, disappointed.

"Ma'am, Sir, you can come in now." A nurse says, approaching us. Kate and I are immediately at her side. She guides us into a room. As we enter, I realize that my hands are shaking in anticipation and excitement. Wow, this is going to be one heck of a night.