Creepypasta Headcannon Oneshots: Book One

The One With EJ's Will Of Iron (feat. a table moving upstairs that made me jump)

"No one in the Underealm is able to resist Sally's charm, except Eyeless Jack. Everyone in immensely jealous."

"Jeff?"

The eyelidless killer looked down at the small child who had spoken.

"Whaddya want, squirt?" He asked. Sally rocked back and forth on her heels.

"Can we play dress-up?" She asked innocently. Jeff's eyebrows shot up to his hairline in surprise, and he choked on a laugh.

"'Dress-up?'" he repeated, still chortling. "Hell to the no- that'll be the vacume cleaner to my crumbled dignity."

The raven turned back to Clockwork, ready to resume their ever-going argument about the quantity of knives a person should weild (seriously, he's been in this buisness faaaaar longer than she has, he knows better) when the unmistakeable sound of sniffling caught his ears.

His eyes widened. Shit.

"Wh-Why won't you play with me?" Sally sniffled, tears welling up in her big green eyes.

In front of her, Jeff flailed crazily, scrambling for an answer that would leave his battered dignity (mostly) intact.

All fucks were thrown out the window, however, when Sally took a deep breath, obviously prepared to start wailing like a siren at any moment.

"Alright we'll play dress-up!" Jeff blurted, ignoring Clockwork's snickering. (She'd never faced the wrath of a truly enraged Slenderman, so she could go fuck off to intergalactic space gates unknown.)

Immediately Sally brightened, and in that instant, Jeff knew he'd been played by a goddamned 8 year old.

He'd never hear the end of it.

(He'd also never live down the pictures LJ took of him in a fancy pink dress with his hair tied up in ribbons either, but that's a story for another day.)

~~~

"Toby!"

The proxy looked down at Sally, immediately noticing the excited look she wore.

"Yeah?"

"Let's build a fort! Let's build a fort! Let's build a fort!"

A maniac grin crossed Toby's face, and he leaped down off his chair.

"Lead the way!" He screamed, laughing as the excited 8 year old pulled him from the room.

(Toby never turns down the opportunity for a fort, ok? Never.)

~~~

"Masky?"

Tim looked down at the small pasta who had spoken.

"Yeah?" He asked. "What's up Sally?"

"Will you read to me?" Masky sighed and leaned against the wall.

"Can I read to you another night?" He asked. "I'm very tired."

Sally's expression fell.

"Oh. Ok," she mumbled sadly, dejectedly making her way up the stairs. "I'll just... Sleep then."

Watching her climb the stairs like he'd just shot her dog in front of her was tearing Masky's heart in two, and before he knew what he was doing he found himself agreeing to what the child had asked of him.

(You're a weakling, he chided himself later when Hoodie lectured him on the importance of sleep. A total fucking weakling.)

~~~

"Hoodie?"

Brian tensed up. Oh shit. He knew this day would come- the day Sally would use her evil childlike powers of persuasion on him.

"Yes?" He asked cautiously. Sally beamed up at him.

"Let's make a movie!" She chirped, gesturing to the video camera he clutched tightly in his left hand. Hoodie winced.

"I'm sorry Sally, this is for work," he said, hefting the camera for show. Sally pouted.

"But Slendy doesn't have to know," she said moodily. "I won't tell." Hoodie sighed, but was nevertheless determined to stand his ground.

"I'm sorry Sally," he said, trying to make it sound like he meant it. "But the answer is still no."

He was so close, Hoodie beamoned silently. So close to escaping, but then he made the mistake of looking at Sally.

"Oh no," he said outloud, and if Sally were older he would have said a hell of a lot worse. "No. Not the puppy dog eyes."

Sally, being the small, demon spawn she is did none of the above and instead elected to crank up the intensity of said puppy dog eyes.

Needless to say, Hoodie caved.

("But she had puppy dog eyes!" Hoodie protested as Slender gave him a stern talking to. "Have you ever had to resist puppy dog eyes? I think not!")

~~~

"(Y/N)?"

You looked up from your book at the small brunette child with radioactive green eyes that had spoken.

"Yeah, Sally?" You asked, dog-earing the page you were on. (Meanwhile, somewhere in the distance, millions of bibliophiles died a horrible death.) "What's up?"

The small child beamed up at you; "Play with me?"

You cast a longing look at your book; "Aw, I dunno, maybe later..."

Sally looked up at you pleadingly; "Please?"

You crumbled. The puppy dog eyes were too much.

"Ok," you set your book aside. "What did you wanna play?"

A devious grin crossed Sally's face, and you felt a shiver run up your spine when she said; "Hide and Seek?"

~~~

"EJ?"

Jack sighed and looked down at Sally, already knowing where this was going.

"Whatever it is, no," he said flatly, not in the mood for any of this shit.

Sally immediately started pouting, which for reasons unknown to man only increased Jack's ire.

"I said no," the cannibal repeated himself. "I don't want to."

With that, the redhead (is EJ a redhead? I feel like he's got reddish-brownish hair, but there isn't a word for that, so redhead it is.) walked away, unaware of the awed stare you had fixed on him.

"Eyeless is the only one who's immune to Sally's charm," Jeff said, jelously clear in his tone.

"Yeah," Masky agreed (when did he get here?) "It's demon magic or some shit."

"Wish I h-had demon *tic* mag-magic," Toby added wistfully, looking very out of place with his hair tied up in pink ribbons. (Sally had, unsurprisingly, wanted to play dress up, and Toby was the unlucky pasta.)

"Hey! Guys!"

Dread coated your stomach. Slowly, you all rotated on the spot, coming face to face with Sally, who was wearing an expression far too devious for your liking.

"Wanna play hide and go seek?"

(Sally totally knew what she was doing the entire time. She just likes to torture her family, lol.
Also omfg you are all so kind with your comments seriously I go to read them and I've just got the biggest smile on my face.)