Behind Classroom Doors II

LXXXII- Pretty Women

Friday...

    "Hey, wake up." I whisper, nudging Shawn's shoulder. His eyes open up and he lifts his head. "Good morning." I say with a small smile.

His arms that are on either side of my torso hold me a little more. He makes a soft groaning sound, "Good morning." He responds.

I lift up and run my fingers through his hair. "How did you sleep?"

Shawn's eyes close momentarily before opening back up again. "Much better now that you're with me. I wish I could wake up to you every morning." I'm surprised by his words.

"You do?" I question.

I move my hand down to rub small circles on Shawn's back. "If I had it my way you would live here, with me. That way I can wake up to you every morning." Did he just...ask me to move in with him? I don't know how to respond, first he wants me to be his girlfriend and that was already a big step in itself. Now he's talking about living together. "Or not..." He rolls over and gets out of bed, taking my silence as a no.

I sit up, "No, it's...it's unexpected." This isn't something I can just decide on in the moment.

Shawn rubs his hand over his face and sighs, "I don't know why. It's no secret that I love you and we both feel safer with each other." I have to think this through, not say yes on a whim.

"Of course I feel safe with you, but a month and a half ago I thought we'd never see each other again. Now you're my teacher again and things are complicated, again." If we're being honest, our situation hasn't changed at all. "Let's say I say yes and move in, how are we going to explain that to my roommate? Or my parents when they find out I stopped living in the dorms? My friends and family are bound to ask questions and I just what? Lie to them?" I don't want to turn down his offer but we have to be smart about this. Not to mention I already lie to everyone except for Hunter.

He crosses his arms over his chest and shrugs. "Tell them."

"Tell them?" I repeat.

"Yes, tell your parents, and your roommate, and fucking Becca, and Jenny for all I care. Tell anyone you want to tell." I can't believe what he's saying to me.

I get out of bed and chuckle humorlessly, "You don't know what you're telling me to do."

Shawn walks over to me and grabs my shoulders so that we're making eye contact. "I know that when I go to bed at night, I want you there. I know that when I wake up I want you there. It doesn't matter where I am, I want you with me, Livia. So yes, tell whoever you have to tell to sleep better at night. As long as it's me you're going to bed with." I want to say yes and let the whole world know. My brain is screaming at me that this is going to blow up in my face.

If we're going to stay a secret, then we have to be smart. "I can't." I whisper, getting out of his grasp and getting my things. "I'll see you in class, Mr. Morgan."

The pained look on his face when I leave absolutely kills me inside. I wanted more than anything to listen to my heart but it's not that easy. It's never that easy.

I thought we made progress last night, he was finally talking to me about his past. Today was a setback, I'm worried he's going to close himself off again. I shake my head, I can't think about that right now. I'm supposed to be meeting Hunter for coffee, maybe he can tell me what I should do.

By the time I get back to my dorm, Katie is gone. I quickly get ready and make my way out to the coffee shop inside the cafeteria. I don't see Hunter at first so I go ahead and get in line. It's a good thing I know his order because he doesn't show up until after I've already paid. "You owe me five bucks." I say, handing him his iced latte.