SHORT CIRCUIT, connor dbh (discontinued)

; 16

"We did everything we could."

Those 5 words made Connor's heart sink.

"What?" Hank said in disbelief.

"She died on the table," the doctor explained.

"She can't be- she can't be gone." Hank mumbled. It was the first time Connor had seen the lieutenant cry.

It's hard to explain the emotion you feel when you lose someone you love. You don't truly know it until you've experienced it yourself. Sadness, mixed with a sort of physical pain in your chest when it sinks in. A pain, an anger you'd only know if you've ever had to accept the fact that you'll never see someone you love again. Whether they're family, a friend, or a lover, you'll never realized how much you cared until the moment you know they're gone. That's how Liv's partners felt.

Connor kept thinking of the smiling face he had seen just yesterday, who couldn't be happier to see him. She was gone. He'd never see her like that again. She'd never wrap her arms around him in a hug, or kiss him on the cheek, or intertwine her fingers with his as she slept. He would never hear the sweet, soft voice that told him so many secrets, that trusted him so much. He never would get another chance to gaze into her brown eyes that looked at him with such amazement. No more nights at her apartment, or pointless conversations, or investigating together. No more Liv.

"I'll give you two a moment," the doctor excused herself, leaving the two men alone.

"She's," Hank choked up from crying, "gone."

"I," Connor turned to say something to comfort Hank, but couldn't, as he was inconsolable himself.

Tears formed in Connor's eyes, which was something he didn't know he could even do. He wasn't programmed to feel this way about someone's death. He's supposed to be cold, and emotionless. This should be nothing more than a distraction from his investigation, yet this sadness was consuming him.

The woman couldn't leave his thoughts. Just this morning, they had been so happy. Connor never would have thought that that was the last time he would see her completely happy and carefree. Singing along to the songs on the radio as she drove to her final case.

"It should've been me," Hank said, "She pushed me to the ground to save me, and she got shot. If it weren't for me, she'd be right here."

"I hesitated to shoot it, and that killed her. It's not your fault, it's mine," Connor blamed himself.

"She's too young. You two deserved to be happy with each other. I'm sorry, Connor."

Connor remained silent. He wasn't sure what Hank meant about him and Liv, but he didn't think on it too much. He couldn't concentrate on anything but her. For once, he needed someone. He needed her more than he would've ever admitted before.

Hank and Connor sat in silence for a long time. Both were still sat in the hospital chairs. Connor had his head in his hands, and Hank leaned back, his head hitting the bland white wall behind them.

--------------

Liv saw nothing. Everything was black, no one or nothing in sight. The silence in this unknown place was deafening. She tried to call out for someone, but no sound came from her body. A familiar face approached her.

"Olivia," the woman said.

"Mom?" Liv asked.

"You've grown up so much. Honey, what happened to you?"

"I was shot. We were investigating a case and I got shot. Mom, am I dead?"

"The moment you knew what a cop was you told me you wanted to be one. I'm so proud of you, Olivia. You became what you always wanted to be, and you helped so many people." Her mother avoided her question.

"I did," Liv smiled, "Mom, why did you leave me? Dad, he-"

"I'm so sorry, honey. I should've never done that to you. I was selfish. I wish I was there, to be your mother. I should have been there to watch you grow into the beautiful young woman you are. He didn't deserve you, and take all those moments for granted. I'll always regret it; we could have had a good life together, just you and me," Liv's mother hugged her.

"Mom, I love you."

"I love you, honey. You deserved a better life, and I should have been there to give that to you."

"Mom, I thought I'd never see you again."

"Listen to me. You need to get back to them. Hank loves you, you're like a daughter to him. And I know Connor won't admit it, but he loves you too, he's a nice boy. They're waiting on you, you need to get back to them."

"How do you know about them?"

"Mother's institution. Now go back, you've got a whole life to live."

"Mom, I'm not leaving you. Not again. I just got you back!"

"Honey, you have to."

"But I'm dead, I can't just go back. I don't even know where we are!" she screamed.

"I know my little girl, you'll find a way out of this. Take care of yourself, Olivia." Her mother kissed her on the forehead, and when Liv looked up again she was gone.

"Mom? Mom!" she began to cry.

How do I get out of here?

----------

Connor and Hank sat in silence, wondering how either one will ever manage without their partner. The same doctor from before was heading towards them, a much quicker pace than last time.

"There may be something we can do for Olivia. It's experimental, but it may work for her."