A Girl in a Forgetful World

Playing With Fire

Your eyes used to give me

A place in the world.

Your hugs used to give me

Warmth and comfort.

Your whispered "I love you"s used to give me

A smile 

And a jump in my stomach.

Your body on mine used to give me

A thrill,

Something I had never felt before.

Your texts in the morning used to give me

A reason to get up,

A reason to keep living...

If I could have known

We would be playing with fire,

I would have quit the games.

Your eyes on me now give me

A sense of unease.

You knew how my body worked,

Moved,

How it fit with yours...

The memory of your hugs,

The echo of your love ballads,

The butterflies I always had around you...

They all burn in my head,

Like a constant migraine.

They're always there,

No matter what...

And they still haven't left.

I don't know if they ever will.

I'm much smarter now,

Realizing that we had always

Been playing with fire.

It seems everyday now

We have a new conversation

About us.

Not how our day is going,

What our grades are,

If our friends were behaving, no -

A talk about us...

 You and I 

And love.

We were constantly

Playing with fire.

My hands,

Lips,

And heart

Are covered in little white scars.

You burned me

With every word and action

You formed and committed...

I hope you burn, too.

Darling,

We were playing with fire...