Runaway ✔

093 • Dana

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Kozik watched her for a while. "Where did the time go? Last time we discussed Iron Man versus Superman and now we're talking about kids. Speaking of our former heroes..." He reached into the inside pocket of his cut and took out a folded package. "I've carried on our tradition."

Eager as if she was still a child, she pulled off the elastic and rolled out the comic. 

"You still lack a good taste?" she asked when she saw Batman on the cover. She'd always been more into the Marvel comics, but Kozik always brought her DC. She secretly liked them just as much, thanks to him she'd read hundreds of them, but she would never admit it. 

"Thanks. It's been years ago since I've held a comic book in my hands."

"Then it's about time old times will relive. Even though you can't tell me that crush of yours has no comics in the house. He scores high on the geek-indicator."

"We're busy with other things than reading comics."

He laughed. "Right, you're old enough now to do those things, hmm?"

She poked his side with her elbow, even though she could appreciate his inappropriate jokes. The discomfort of the beginning of the evening was long gone. Thoughtlessly she flipped through the comic while leaning against Kozik. "I've missed you, Koz."

He rustled her hair. "I missed you too, girl. You still need help with a how should I make up with my angry bad ass biker boyfriend plan? I recommend a blowjob."

"Yeah? You cheered 'em up with that once?" she asked with a blank face, still flipping through the book. There was no way she would do that. It was a border she didn't want to cross yet, no matter how angry Juice would be. But that wasn't something she was going to tell Kozik. 

"It was a rhetorical question, Koz," she said when he was about to answer. "I don't wanna know what your boys nights look like." She closed the comic book and looked at him with a serious glance. She needed to get it off her chest, it was bothering her the whole night. "Juice ain't unyielding. We'll figure that out. If it was him, we would've talked it out by now." She sighed and fiddled with a cracked cuticle. 

"Then what is it?"

Dana bit her lip, not knowing how much she needed to tell him before he would understand. Usually he was very perceptive, so she decided to just come out with it. "When he beat you... grabbed you by the throat... That was a side of him I've never seen before. And the look in his eyes, his tensed face... He scared me, Koz." She took a deep breath. "My ex... He was violent too. And it felt... it felt like I had an aggressive boyfriend again."

"Juice ain't aggressive, Dane. I've known him for ten years. He's protective and  stands up for himself, but he's not violent. I deserved a beat up." She heard him chuckle. "I fight those guys all the time. We're macho's, all of us." He patted her knee. "And you secretly find that attractive, otherwise you wouldn't be falling in love with bad boys over and over again."

"But whether that's smart, is a different story," she muttered. She raked a hand through her hair. "You know, Koz... Rationally I can argue all this. I know he's not Maddox. But what I felt, the associations I made, the fact that I froze when he touched me afterwards... and his grave look I see again and again... I just can't let go of it." She heaved a deep sigh. "And I find it hard to tell him that he reminded me of Maddox. It will hurt him and..."

"Juice's a big boy. He'll get over it. It will only help him to understand you. If he'd known this, he never would have treated you so coldly."

Dana pondered his words. She wondered what he was doing now. Had he gone home, or was he still at the clubhouse? What was on his mind? A lot, she didn't doubt that. And knowing him... he would see how Kozik kissed her and she didn't push him away, over and over again. What did he think they we're doing now? Figuring out how much they still liked each other?

Dana looked aside, to Kozik's lips. She had no desire to kiss him, not for a single moment since they were here. His arm around her shoulder, leaning against him, she liked that. But she wasn't longing for him like she'd longed for Juice– and was still longing for him.

"You're right. He has no idea why I behaved this way." She grabbed her phone and checked the time. 11 PM. He probably wasn't sleeping yet. "If he's home... you want me to take me to him? I doubt I will be able to sleep when I wait 'till tomorrow."

A smile played Kozik's lips. "That's what I like; women who take the bull by the horns." He winked. "Of course I'll give you a ride. After all, all of this is my fault."

Dana looked up his phone number. Her heart bounced in her throat when she called him. The phone rung once, twice. A third time.

With an uneasy feeling she lowered the device. He didn't pick up, while his phone was always within reach because of the club. Was he showering? Already sleeping? Or did he ignore her on purpose?

"He doesn't answer," she said quietly. 

"He's probably focused on his game," Kozik reassured her. "Just leave him be. Maybe it's even better if you don't talk before tomorrow, when you've both slept and are – in his case – sober again."

With a deep sigh Dana agreed. She didn't have a choice. 

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Hi! I started a group for SOA/Mayans MC fanfic writers/readers on Facebook. It would be great if it became a lively community so join us! :) I'll post the link in the comments. :)