lungs

part 25

"but mom." i whined, "i'm fine."

she squeezed the steering wheel as she drove, "i know, i know. but dr. berklin said to come once a month."

i groan and slouch back in my seat as i look out the window. this is so stupid, i'm fine, i'm completely fine.

+

"you will take this before school and before bed." said dr. berklin.

i take pill bottle from his hand and furrow my eye brows. "why?"

"it's just a better version of the medication you have now." he says.

"oh, okay." i said as i looked at the bottle. "anna cross age 16." it's says.

"there's side affects." he said looking at my mom and then me. "you will have, headaches, hallucinations, chest pain, and sometimes vomiting."

he looked at my mom. "mrs. cross, if anything happens," he takes out a card from his pocket on his shirt, "call me."

she takes the card and nods, and then he walked out.

+

i wrap myself in my bed sheets and shove my head into my pillow. my phone says 12:09. jacob and jeremy are probably at lunch right now while i'm here.

i wonder what joey is doing. i pick up my phone and go on his contact. "i left early, wanna hang?"

he usually reads the texts and reply's but he didn't.

i lean up in my bed and pull the covers down to my waist. i pull on sweatpants with a champion hoddie with black uggs.

i take my phone off the charger and go downstairs. my mom is in the kitchen with dad, arguing.

"i'm going out." i told them, but they didn't hear.

i put my phone in the pocket of my hoddie and walk across the street to joeys house. he's obviously home because he's suspended but he's probably sleeping

"im at ur window." i texted him again, maybe he's like taking a shower.

"joseph"

"joey"

"birlem"

still no answer.

i went up to the porch and rang his door bell. soon i hear footsteps come up to the door and unlock it.

there stands joeys mom with kashius in her hands. "hi anna" she said, smiling.

"hi mrs, jen. is joey here?" i asked.

she nodded, "yeah he's up in his room, you know how boys are."

i raised my eyes brows and nodded in a joking manner." oh yeah."

"anna!" kashius yelled, clapping his hands.

i put my finger out and he wrapped his hand around my fingers. i giggled as mrs. jen stepped away from the door way so i could come in.

"hi kash." i say in a baby voice.

he giggled and smiled really big, god he's so cute.

once i was done playing with kashius i head up the stairs. i've been in joeys house once and that was the time mr. skies partnered us together to work on a science project, so i know where his room is.

once i reach his door i hear voices inside.

"you know you want it." i hear a female voice say, but almost a whisper.

"lexi, no, not right now." so it's lexi, i thought he didn't care about her or something.

"come on jojo." she begged, "do you think that girl anna would give you what i have."

i put my hands over my mouth, this hoe.

"be quiet." he said, "my mom is home."

"awe little jo jo is scared." what the hell is wrong with this girl? his name is joey, not jojo. he's not freaking jojo siwa.

"no, i'm not. i just don't wanna get in trouble. and you shouldn't be here." he said.

"well i am." she says, "oh what's this?" i hear her say again.

"give me my phone." he commanded.

"i left early, wanna hang?"she read my texts that i sent him out loud.

she giggled, "joey, why do you even bother with this girl?"

he sighed, "i don't know okay? she's different."

"well what about me? you've known me longer joey, since this whole school year. and you've only known that rat for a month."

"she's not a rat." he snarled.

"well joey, it's me or her. " she says, like she means it.

he sighs, "i-"

"choose joey!" she said, loudly a little.

"fine you."

i can feel my eyes water. he picked her, over me.

"i got to get something to drink." he says, i can hear him walking over to the door.

shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.

"anna?" joey said as he opened the door and saw me with my watery eyes. "what are you doing here?"

he lied to me. that night when he snuck in and brought me chocolates and roses for the first time and told me he was sorry and that he wasn't trying to get in my pants, was all a set up.

he lied.

"i was just leaving." i said as i try not to cry. i wipe the bottom of my eyes.

he grabbed my wrist. "it wasn't what you think."

i look at him in the eyes. "why?" i asked. "you told he we were something but then you choose her over me?"

"look," he says, "i-"

"no, save it. have fun with alexis." i said, remembering how she hated it when joey didn't call her by lexi.

i get out of his grip start to go to the stairs.

"anna, please, just-"

i turn around and glare at him. "just what joey- huh?"

"just....." he takes a deep breath "it's just i don't wanna lose you. because, um."

"because what joey? you're getting on my nerves." i spit.

"because i like you."