Coach Lovato (girlxgirl)

chapter 73

Rae's POV

Ever just wish life could be easy? No worries just completely easy?

I have.

I have wished that everyday since the accident and everyday since I met Demi, everyday since the second accident and everyday since school started again.

But everything has just felt harder and harder.

I am not rethinking this, or am I?

I love Demi and I wanna be with her for the rest of my life but it is so much pressure

"Elle, I can't do it." I tell her as we stand in the room getting ready for the wedding. She is my maid of honor and Maddie is a bridesmaid but that's it. 

Demi has Dallas and some of her friends and some other people. James is going to walk me down the aisle. Pretty much all the guests are Demi's friends and family and I have a few people too. I invited Ms. Lowry, Elle's mom, my, what if Demi backs out, what if she isn't here but they told me she is." I rant. 

"She is here, I saw here and she is very happy to be here. Maddie and everyone else will be here soon too." Elle says trying to calm me down but failing. 

"I just wanna go home and curl up in bed with Demi, why do we have to do all of this crap!?!" I exclaim. 

I know you are wondering where Sarge is well he is will Dianna and them because I was at their house this morning talking to Dianna about something and I decided it would be better if he came later. We have been working on being separated when he is at a  place he is comfortable so that if something happens again and we get split he won't be to upset. Therefore, I thought it would be okay but I need him or Demi, but she is stuck on the who see each other before the wedding thing. 

"If you really wanna go we can but I don't think you want to." She says trying to reason with me. "I think you getting in your own head too much." She continues but nothing is getting through.

Suddenly she picks up her phone.

"Talk to your girl, she's gone crazy." She says handing me the phone but I don't speak.

"Hello?" Asks Demi's voice. "What's going on?" She asks again sound stressed.

"I can't do it, any of it. Your mom and family aren't here, Sarge isn't here. I can't do it without them here. I haven't even heard if James is here." I say. " We should just go home and curl up on the bed and forget all of this."

"Babe. James just got here and he is on his way to your room. Mom just texted ten minutes ago and said they were almost here so they close too. I need to take some deep breaths and just talk to me." She says sounding more stressed.

"I had a dream last night." I admit to her. "It was really bad, Sarge had to wake me up and I couldn't sleep."

"I am so sorry, baby. I should've been there." She says guiltily. 

"No no, it's okay, I just, I am scared, Demi." I sigh feeling tears well up. 

"Baby, don't be scared." She says. 

"Demi, who are you talking to?" I hear Dianna's voice in the background. "I am talking to Rae, Mom." 

"Tell her Maddie is on her way with Sarge and I will be there in a little while to check on her." She tells Demi but I hear her. 

"Tell her she doesn't need too." I say but really I need someone to talk me through this.

Since air told everyone about everything Dianna has become really good at talking me through calming down when Demi is at work or is with her sisters or for whatever reason.

"She will be there in a little while you know there is no arguing." Demi tells me making her mother scoff.

After a few more minutes we hand up and Maddie comes walking in with Sarge and I and instantly calmer knowing everyone is here. 

We stand at the altar with my brother between us as the guest watch us intently and I look at Demi not breaking eye contact no mater water. 

"Demi, would you like to read your vows first?" James and ask and she nods.

"I am not really sure where to start. I have been working on this for months now and I could never find the right words to explain how I feel for you in a way I haven't already expressed. I also couldn't find a way to make the same promise I have made to you since day one in a new way. So, I have decided to tell you the same thing in the same way but in front of all the people important to us." She smiles softly taking a deep breath before continuing. "The day we met I instantly felt something for you that I couldn't understand, I thought it was just a need to protect you but it slowly but surely turned into much more. Over the past year and some change, I have learned who you are and who I am. I was meant to love you and be with you the rest of my life and that is exactly what I am about to do. I told you one time I was here to play the long game and I think this pretty much seals the deal, baby." She says using her analogy making people look at us confused.

"And Rae?" James nods to me. 

"Demi, the day I walk into that gym for the first time, I instantly want to do what you want me to do, I wanted to make you happy. I wanted your approval like I hadn't wanted from anyone else in my life." I tell her for the first time. "I stormed out not to make you made but because I thought you already thought poorly of me and it upset me, well, that and as we all know I hate being still." I joke and everyone laughs including Demi. "From the moment you stopped my first panic attack to the moment you stayed with me no matter how bad they got, I knew I couldn't live without you in my life and at first that scared me because I knew you could slip through my fingers at any moment but, now? Now I am scared I can't get rid of you." I joke again making everyone laugh including her again. "But for real, I owe it to you that I can stand here and proudly say that I love you and I can't wait to start our life together." 

After we put the rings on each other's fingers and kiss against my will because I was embarrassed we head to the reception. 

"Listen up, listen up!" James says loudly getting up on the stage. "I would like to say something."

Everyone quiets down and I lay my head on Demi's shoulder as we listen to him.

"8 years ago I left home after graduation and I left a child who was lost and had no sense of purpose in life, Just over 2 years ago I came back to a broke young woman who was just trying to fight through her demons." He starts. "I did my best to help but I was never able to understand my little sister as much and as hard as I tried, whether because she didn't want me to or because she didn't understand either. I fought every day just to see her get even a little better or struggle just a little less but it never happened. Then one everything just changed, sure everything wasn't perfect overnight, there were bumps along the way, but that day everything changed for the better. That light that was in my little sister's eyes when she was little was back and getting brighter every day, it still gets brighter." James looks to Demi. "And for that, I would like to thank you." Demi nods and James continues. "I would like to wish my little sister and Demi the best and happy life."

With that Elle, Dallas and one of Demi's other friend give speeches before it is time to leave. 

We get in a car Demi rented for the honeymoon and drive away from our family and friends with Sarge sitting in the back seat. 

I can't wait to live my life with this woman and make new memories.