Undeniable (MxM)

Please Stay Safe

*Lines given in Bold are flashback scenes*

Ant woke up a few minutes later hearing the knocks on the door. He winces as he sits up and realises that he had fallen asleep crying. He felt rage towards himself for being so weak and pathetic

I have to be strong...I shouldn't let go of my guard...oh god Dec...where are you...

The knocks turn louder and Ant stands up. He opens the door with some difficulty expecting Johnny or Robbie but his eyes widen to see Simon.

Ant: "Si..."

Simon looks at him in disbelief and sighs "Look at your face! Did you sleep at all?"

Ant:"I-I did"

Simon : "Wash your face. Food is ready...come down..okay?"

Ant nods and suddenly Simon pulls him to his chest "Come here"

Simon: "We will find him okay? You are not alone! Never think that you are alone!!"

Ant clutches him tight and nods "I can't live without him Si... I... just can't"

Tears sting Simon's eyes "I know. We all know that. We will find him okay?"

Ant nods again

Simon: "Come soon. We are waiting for you"

Ant sighs as Simon walked down and walked into the room, consciously avoiding any photos of Dec on the walls or beside their bed knowing he won't be able to stand strong if he sees them. He enters the shower and the moment he steps into the cold tiles, that scent hits him: The smell of Dec's shampoo, Dec's aftershave and Dec himself.

Ant closes his eyes as memories hit him hard. Why am I like this? Why am I acting like he is not coming back?! Of course he is. I will make sure he is!

He looks in the mirror and his heart skips a beat to realise what Si meant. I did sleep, didn't I? But when did I fall asleep and was it a fine sleep?

He doesn't remember dreaming anything, but then...he never does.

As he washed his face and then stood under the cold shower...not only to wash away his tears but also his fear...his despair... he finds himself thinking back, memories flooding his head....:

Ant wakes up with a flinch and groans a bit as he felt himself tucked into an uncomfortable position. Suddenly caring hands are around him coaxing and comforting him

Dec: "Hey, you are alright...you are fine...I have got you...I am not going anywhere... I got you...I got you..."

He feels Dec's lips on his hair and his gentle hands stroking his hair, rubbing his neck, back and arms

Dec: "It's fine...it's going to be fine...I am here.. "

It was too warm and loving that Ant cuddles into the hold and then looks up to see concern-filled green blue eyes staring at him.

Ant: Dec?"

Relief floods inside Dec's eyes and he hugs Ant to his chest "You are awake"

Ant hums and slowly sits up, shifting from Dec's lap and asks worriedly

Ant: "How did I end up on your lap?"

Dec rolls his eyes "You my man, was panicking in your sleep. So I had to hold you close the whole night"

Ant's eyes widen at that with guilt and concern "You were sitting like this the whole night?!"