With the last chapters being quite negative and drama-filled, here's some positive news:
YA GIRL'S GOING TO UNI!! MY DREAM UNI!
God, this whole process has been a nightmare. You guys know how I've having a health crisis? This has been the other main worry going on.
I won't go into too much detail because I'm lazy but I was pretty sure I wouldn't be accepted into a hall of residence. The uni inquired about mental health and I was open about my mental illnesses (leaving out the suicide attempts and self harm because there's no way they'd let me in with that on my record. They'd be wary that I was a danger to myself) because I've been working on being open about my mental health this year. My parents thought the uni would use my mental health as a reason to turn me away. It was a whole drama. In nz universities the hall applications happen before actual uni enrollment. But SIKE I got into my first choice of hall!! I get to live in this beautiful hall for a year:
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
All for the small price of $17,000. Yeahhhh. Shit's rough. Luckily first year of uni is fees free so the hall is the only thing I'm paying for. I was terrified I wouldn't get in a hall. Because sure, I'd still be living in Wellington and going to uni, but living in a hall is a huge part of the first-year university experience and such a great way to get involved, meet people, have experiences, and adjust to independent living. And also because rent is very expensive. But that's something 2022 me has to worry about!
My courses have all been accepted, so I have a place in the university itself. Ya girls gonna get a bachelor of arts with a major in psychology, and if all goes well, a postgraduate diploma is clinical psychology.
I'm taking some pretty cool courses next year! I'm taking two psych courses, both introductory courses. One is more focused on research methods, mental health, human development, the more sociocultural side of psychology. The other is about the biological side of psychology, brain function, cognitive processing, the science behind behaviour. I'm taking a stats course (compulsory for a psych major) which is statistical analysis. Boring as hell, but necessary, and not all that difficult. I'm taking a history course (I missed doing history so much this year!) Unfortunately the course I wanted to take (it was all about colonisation) wasn't available, but I'm taking another interesting one about the history of the people of New Zealand, the cultures, conflicts, and all that. Sounds really interesting! I'll be taking a writing course - not a creative writing one, creative writing is only offered at second year level and above - but an academic one. I just feel like it will be useful to learn to write at a tertiary education level. I'll be taking a Maori society course (recommended for clinical psychologists to have knowledge of other cultures and Maori culture in particular) which unfortunately is based around oral presentations but seems interesting nonetheless! It'll be about Maori culture beliefs, and development, which as you might've picked up on from my other courses, is the kind of shit I love. I'll be taking a sociology course about mental health and the perception of mental illness and treatment in different societies and cultures. Literally combines my two favourite things, mental health and culture! The last course I'll take is cell biology. I find bio very interesting and this course will lead into genetics. Plus, I'm going to need a break from all of those humanities.
Either way I'm really excited for my actual coursework. And in second year I'll hopefully be able to incorporate some creative writing papers, if I get into the program.
But what I'm the most excited about is that this will be my dream city and dream university. It's no ivy league - we don't have that kind of thing in nz - but it's a good university. Its national rank is 5 or 6 out of 57 tertiary education programs. The main reason I chose this uni though is because I LOVE the city. I never in a million years thought I could move here. Wellington is fucking expensive. But I'll make it work.
I'm so excited to go. I need change in my life. I've lost my teen years to mental illness and now that I'm finally starting to recover, I just want to have experiences, build a life that I want to live in and all that. That's why I was so desperate to live in Wellington, because I truly feel like I'm home every time I go there. Literally every time I go for a holiday I dramatically look out the hotel window down at the city and cry about leaving. I need my music video moment. I'm so ready for some independence and to challenge myself and grow.
I have a friend who graduated and went to uni early. She struggled with her mental health and has always been really shy and very much in her shell. From talking to her, living in Welly and uni life has suited her so well. She's had such a glow up. I really hope this change will have the same effect on me.
