Hook(er) Up - A Clexa Fic

Chapter 29- Still the same

Lexa watched as her sister set up coasters on the table, before following with mugs filled with hot chocolate. She asked to help but Anya refused, telling her to sit quietly before she could interrogate her. Instead, she sat swaddled in her blanket, staring around the room. At the counter and table. The kitchen island. Through the door to her room left ajar, just enough to show a single balsam candle.

Soon enough, her sister returned from the kitchen and sat by her, handing her a mug.

"So you're telling me you've managed to overwork yourself into a stroke because you were trying to avoid someone?"

A slow nod came from the girl wrapped in a blanket.

"Avoid someone or avoid thinking about someone?"

Anya was met with avoiding eyes and glued-shut lips. Lexa only stared into her cup- her unspoken language of guilt.

"So... both."

Silence.

"Lexa, Is it a girl?"

Another tentative nod.

"Lexa, did you seriously get a stroke because of a crush?" Anya couldn't believe how stupid the words coming out of her mouth sounded. Even more so, she couldn't believe Lexa's silence in response. A silence that most definitely meant a yes.

Anya shook her head and resisted the urge to roll her eyes because only Lexa. Only Lexa could pull off something that stupid and think of it as the best plan of action.

"How long?"

"Well, it wasn't just that-" the red-faced mess of a girl croaked trying to change the topic. "It was also just a lot of work because of Flame Corp and everything Becca wanted to-"

"How long, Lexa?"

Lexa sat in silence, feeling the blood pulsing to her cheeks as she desperately tried to frown it away. She gripped her mug harder and tried to shake the image of her crush away. Because how was that a justifiable crush? There was no way she was going to admit she ever met with a hooker, let alone fall for one.

"How long since... what?"

Anya held a stiff expression and raised a brow at the girl.

So Lexa choked up her pride once more, feeling her sister staring at her. She felt her gut churn. She felt the saliva pouring down her throat as she gulped. She felt her ears turn red. "Ah... about- about a year."

She couldn't look at Anya in the eyes. All she could do is sit helplessly and await a mocking reaction. She heard her breathing in, ready to say something, and then just exhaling a deep sigh.

"Who?"

"I- what?"

"Who is it, Lexa?"

She shook her head. That, she was not telling.

"Really?" Her sister just gave her a disappointed stare.

"It's not important."

Anya rolled her eyes. Even with such progress, she was not going to get it out of Lexa was she? Because Lexa just had to be so irritatingly stubborn.

"Fine."

But she continued to watch as Lexa avoided any eye contact. She continued to watch her sister hide her face behind her knees, covering as much of it as she could behind her blanket. She continued to watch her play with her fingers wrapped around her mug, waiting for the hot-chocolate inside to cool down enough to drink- enough to give her some sort of distraction.

Anya couldn't help but chuckle. To think that after all of these years, her sister was still the exact same person. That she may have become an (overly) accomplished adult practically running the world, yet she was still that same little girl who freaked out whenever a girl held her hand. 

She rolled her eyes. "Lexa, c'mere."

"Hm?" Two scared puppy eyes looked up at her from the blanket.

Anya pulled her sister to herself and wrapped her in a big bear hug, almost making Lexa spill her drink as she was tugged to lean on her. "Talk to me," she hummed, "why is she so special?" Anya's arms cradled around her sister's torso.

"Seriously, An?"

"Yes, seriously. Tell me about her, Lexie. I wanna know."

The younger girl snorted. "I feel like I'm in middle school."

"Whatcha mean?"

"When's the last time you called me that?"

Anya smirked. "When's the last time I had to pry information out of you about your crush?"

"I'm not ten, Anya."

"You sure?" she mocked.

Lexa rolled her eyes and took a sip of her drink, ignoring Anya's satire.

"Really though, tell me about her. She sure has to be something to be able to mess you up this bad."

...

"She's nice... and pretty... and caring."

"Three things you're not." she snorted.

"Shut up."

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Keep going."

Lexa sighed, falling deeper into her sister's grasps and the comfort of the covers. "She's really sweet... like really sweet. She always listens and she always knows what to say. Doesn't really talk about herself or her life- she kinda just...  cares more about her friends and people around her than herself. She's so confident but so gentle. Modest and mysterious. And funny. Really fucking funny. She- " She felt herself rambling but didn't seem to care enough to stop. Clarke was just so, so- perfect it was impossible not to go on forever. It was impossible to explain. "Her laugh- she- it's so- it's perfect. It's- it's worth a million dollars. She gets all cute and happy- her- her lips curve up just to make that- that flawless smile and she just looks like a- like a... I DON'T KNOW- whatever the cutest animal is! That's- that's her smile."

Did she even have a single flaw?

"Aaa!" Lexa screamed into her sister's shoulder.

How could she have let something- someone so perfect go? How was she so stupid? What was she going to do? What could she do?

She felt her head being pet, hands gliding down her locks as her sister cooed. "So you're in love-love."

"Shut up."

Anya chuckled and started playing with her hair, braiding little strands of hair to her liking. It was just to have something to do with her hands but it also served to comfort Lexa. "Let me guess, her eyes shine like all the stars in the night sky? Her voice sounds like an angel?" An arm let go of the hair and poked Lexa in the cheek. "And your cheeks get all red until they start hurting whenever you're around her?"

Lexa tilted her head away from Anyas insisting poking, tearing away from her grasp. "Okay, An. I'm not a child. I know how you idealize everything about someone when you like them. But it's not that. She just- she just really is all those things..."

...

"You should tell her."