Hook(er) Up - A Clexa Fic

Chapter 33- Small Talk

The only polite thing to do was to ask if she wanted to enter, right?

Butterflies flew all around in Clarke's stomach. Suddenly, she wished she cleaned more thoroughly, or actually switched around those shelves to look fancier. Or, better yet, just owned a nicer place- maybe with some actually expensive furniture. Something that wouldn't look like an absolute downgrade from Lexa's fancy apartment.

"Um, would you like to come in?" She felt her heart freeze in anticipation. What was she doing? She literally had nothing prepared and had no clue what to say!

"I uh- I don't want to intrude." The girl played with her thumbs, keeping her head down. "I didn't think... I didn't know that you lived here. That- um- Aden knew you."

...

Clarke couldn't help but crack a smile at how nervous and awkward Lexa seemed. It baffled her how someone could be so unintentionally adorable. 

... maybe it wasn't so bad. At least it was awkward for both of them. Right?

"Um, me neither." Clarke cleared her throat, "I only put two and two together about a week ago."

Wait.

Did she really just say that? Did she just give away that Lexa was on her mind?! That she was thinking about her after so long? Was she trying to embarrass herself?? 'Oh no. Quickly, change the topic! Change the topic!'

"...And it's not intruding if I invited you."

Lexa looked as if she was going to mention something but then settled for a nod. Clarke only watched, mesmerized as the girl gave her a friendly, shy, smile and walked in.

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Everything about her was perfect. Holy shit. Clarke could feel herself choking on the air around her just by looking at her.

'Since when was it so warm in here?'

All those months she was meeting Lexa, she was always wearing a suit; Clarke actually convinced herself that that's why she was so hot- that it was a confident, suit-kinda sexy. She was wrong. She was so SO wrong. Why did these cute and casual clothes have such an effect on her?! Why did the girl sitting at her dinner table look like she could take away her soul just by looking at her? Why was Clarke so willing to give it away?!

...Why did she have to look like an absolute bum right now!

'Ok, relax, Clarke. So what, she's in your house? So what, she looks heavenly like always? So what, it's been a year, and you still have a massive crush on her? So what, you weren't mentally prepared for this, and now you don't know how to approach her? It's fine. Everything is fine. Just be casual. Stop getting all panicky and obsessive.' 

Clarke took a deep breath, readjusting her messy hair for the fourth time in the last minute, ' Just breathe. She's not your dad. You're not your mom. She had a stroke, and you just happened to be there, performing on her. You freaked out, but it went well. It's fine. It's over. It's fine. Stop thinking about it. Stop thinking about her. She's okay ...is she?'

Clarke stumbled forward, catching herself on a chair, before pulling herself back up and trying to look relaxed. "I... would you like something to eat? Drink?"

"Oh, it's okay. I don't need anything." The girl gave her a smile shining with puppy-dog innocence. She was one of those people who were so polite and mannered that being good hosts to them was actually hard.

"Really? ...Nothing? No dinner? No lunch?"

"It's okay, I just ate."

There was no way Clarke was letting Lexa just sit there without anything on her plate. She rested her head on her palm, thinking of something else. "Snacks?"