Blick - Blyke
Asslo - Arlo
[5:32 pm]
Asslo: doc gave me a shit ton of medicine and told me not to drink any alcohol
Asslo: so ill be delivering the champagne to john today morning
John: good
Asslo: wait but
Asslo: seraphina can't be good at everything
Sera: oh yes i am
Asslo: she must be a bad kisser
John: no she's good at that too
Asslo: ill take your word for it
Sera: see?
John: i know your weakness @sera
Sera: john please no
[private chat]
John: that 98 on your english test
Sera: oh please no
John: i wont tell
Sera: oh thank goodness
John: but what am i going to get in return?
Sera: idk
John: i have some ideas
Sera: what
John: you help me
Sera: yes????
John: clean my dorm it's so messy
Sera: i was hoping you would ask for something else....
John: no
[group chat]
Blick: so john...
John: what do you want you rip-off light saber
Blick: QwQ
Blick: hey soooo
Blick: do you think you could tidy up my dorm
John: you must have some ulterior motive
John: SERA ARE YOU CHEATING
Sera: ofc not
Sera: and with blick? Ew no
John: good
John: also to answer your question blick no
Blick: fine
Isen: eeyyyy
Isen: we ready to do the thing today?
Blick: this is gc
Remi: ARE YOU CHEATING ON ME WITH THAT ORANGE CHEETO
Isen: what
Isen: NO
Isen: WE'RE PLANNING TO SHOPLIFT A SHOPPING CART FROM TARGET
Elaine: whooo
Asslo: k so the alcohol's on your doorstep john
John: k
Elaine: wait arlo do u need help
Asslo: i do not
Asslo: shoplifting is a serious crime
Blick: eh meh
Sera: do it guys do it
John: whooo
[8:33 pm]
Isen: k so you enter the store and ill distract them, okay?
Blick: on it
Asslo: they're actually doing it
John: the fucking dumbasses are doing it
Remi: guys no! We all thought you were joking!
Isen: we weren't
Isen: ikjosdfj
Isen: uwiehrngj
[twenty minutes later]
Blick: LADS WE DID IT
Sera: aHEM
Blick: LADS AND LADDIES WE DID IT
Sera: good
Isen: WHOOOO
Blick: that cart is now resting at home
John: how did you do it
Isen: I acted drunk and kept running into things
Isen: then i ran around the store with this purse
Isen: everybody was chasing me while blick disabled the security cameras
Isen: then i ran out the fire escape and blended in with the crowd and got tf out of there
Blick: it was e x h i l i r a t i n g
John: wtf are you gonna do with that thing?
Isen: idk
Blick: it's our achievement
John: wow that champagne is s t r o n g
Sera: the bubbles make it stronger
John: ah
coming next:
John: DAMN IT, BLICK
John: HOW MANY TVS WILL YOU KILL
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the shit that goes on at wellston | chatfic
Fanfiction"'ASSLO.'" Remi makes a group chat, but whoooo the UnO cast is NOT easy to deal with. Crack ensues. Achievements: #1 in Jeraphina #1 in Blemi #1 in Asslo #1 in Unordinary #1 in Arlaine #1 in Cecile #1 in John Doe #1 in Jera #1 in Blyke x Remi #12 in...