ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ɪ sᴇᴇ ᴍʏsᴇʟғ | ᴍᴀᴅᴀʀᴀ ᴜᴄʜɪʜᴀ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

❊How it was❊

The heat of summer hangs in the early breeze of Autumn. Leaves turn your favorite shade of red as they fall effortlessly onto the floor. A maid from your estate sweeps each patch with precision, forming piles in her wake.

You watch from afar, dressed in a heavy orange kimono. The serene atmosphere lulls you into a daydream as you imagine yourself pregnant with your husband's child. The happiness a child can bring to your and your husband's life will be immeasurable. That you know.

Much has been planned since your birth and you do not stray from the path designed for you. As someone from the Umemoto clan, you have been preordained to the role of wife. You settle into this role with vivacity and attempt to please your husband as much as possible.

Yet it is times like these when you enjoy a little moment of reprieve to yourself. Drink in the warm colors of Autumn and the smell of cold leaves wafting through the air. The extent of your enjoyment of the changing seasons baffles most, but none pry you from your simple pleasure.

"My lady?"

You do not take your eyes off the methodical cleaning of your maid as you respond to the retainer of your estate. "Yes, Yukino?"

Said man bows slightly behind you. "The Lord has informed us that he will be back later tonight. Shall we arrange a separate meal for him?"

As much as you'd like to frown and pout, you accept the loneliness of the night and continue an even tone. "You do not have to serve him a meal tonight. I have a feeling he will have dinner with the other lords. And you mustn't feel the need to feed me either. The soup from yesterday will do."

"That isn't right, my lady!" your attendant sighs. She's a plain looking woman with straight pink hair who tends to your every whim until she deems it unfit for you. "If you want to carry child, you must eat heartily."

"If I want a child, I need to be able to conceive," you quip. Your attendant silences upon your retort and reserves herself to the background. "It is a joke, Aida... Do not worry so much."

"But, my lady. I know that you will soon have a child and bring much fortune to him. Do not lose hope," Yukino says.

You find it hard not to lose hope, but you have never been one to give in to despair. "You're right. Then please prepare me a hearty meal."

Yukino bows before heading towards the kitchen. Meanwhile Aida begins to fidget once more in her spot. You sense her apprehension and finally break your stare on the maid and onto her. "Is there something else?"

She wants to say something. Desperately so. However, the line between you two is too great for her to surmount the boundary. "No, my lady. I'll get the dinning area ready for dinner."

[x]

He reeks of perfume.

You hide your nose behind the sleeve of your sleeping robes as he enters your shared bedroom late into the night. You had already turned in for the day, dressed in your nightwear while reading a novel.

You husband appears inebriated, lacking in all civility as he stomps over to the futon. He eyes you then sneers. "I thought you'd be a little more prepared for tonight."

You close your book but not before placing a bookmark in it. "Oh?"

"Your duties as a wife," he states with a suggestive smirk while shrugging off his clothes.

As much as you'd like to fulfill such duties, you cannot find any desire in your body to do so when he is in a drunken state. "Can we do this tomorrow when you are more lucid?"

He frowns at your suggestion and stomps over to your side of the futon. "Don't you love me?"

"I-I do." You flinch then retreat from his stench. "It's just that you look like you might be sick if we tried anything strenuous."

Your words take a moment to register, and when they do, he lets out a cackle. "Fine, fine. I am already sated for the day."

Now it's your turn to take the time to digest his words. Meanwhile, he hurries out of his clothes and prepares for sleep. Once beside you on the futon, he presses a kiss on your temple before slumbering like an infant.

You stare down at him, eyes wide with shock. Your mind jumps to an assumption you want no part of, forcing you to lock those harrowing thoughts deep inside your heart. Despite all the signs, you do your best not to think about it.

After all, a child will solve all your problems.

You blow the candle out and lay down on the bed. Again, the smell of Autumn permeates throughout the room, providing you the comfort you need to sleep.

[end of chapter two]

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A/N: Just a small scoop of what the reader dealt with before D-Day. I promise a lot more drama coming soon!