Had I known How to Save a Life

Just Hold On

Chapter 2
*Meredith POV*

Derek is alive. For right now, he's alive. A relief is lifted of my shoulders. "When he gets out of surgery, I want him transported to Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital immediately." I tell her. The doctor is short with brown hair and I can tell she's nervous speaking to me.

"Of course Dr. Grey, the surgery shouldn't take much longer. Maybe 2 hours." she says reassuringly.

"Thank you. Doctor." I respond.

I sit in the waiting room. And I wait. I do the thing we as doctors do when there's a massive trauma headed our way. We hope for the best and prepare for the worst. But I can't sit here for the hour or so not knowing if Derek is alive or dead. I think about texting someone. Or calling someone. "Mommy is daddy okay?" Zola asks me.
"Well sweetie, he was in an accident. You know how he cuts into people's heads and saves their lives? They're doing that to daddy and their going to try and save his life." I tell her. As my eyes well up in tears.
"Just hold on Derek. Please. Just hold on." I whisper to myself.

I walk to the bathroom because I still feel nausea. Vomiting again just put more fear through me. "Mommy are you sick?" Zola asks me, she and Bailey were asleep when I vomited earlier. "Mommy's just scared sweetie, that's what happens sometimes when you're scared. It could be one other thing. But mostly because mommy is scared." I tell her. "I'm scared too mommy." She tells me. "I know you are Zo-Zo, but daddy saves everyone's life, let's hope they save his too" I try to make her feel better.

The 3 of us walk back to the waiting room. A while later the same doctor that spoke to me before, came back.

"Dr. Grey, Derek made it out of surgery. He could wake up with deficits such as memory loss or motor skills. But he's alive. We've arranged for an ambulance to take all of you to GSMH." She tells me.

"Thank you. Thank you so much." I tell her. I hug her just like how my patients do when I tell them their loved one is alive.

"Don't thank me, I know that he's a brain surgeon and that he could wake up with deficits." She says with a shaky voice.

"You did everything you could. And he's alive. He's alive because of you." I tell her. I can live with deficits. We've been through worse. A little short term memory loss; I'll remind him who I am, who the kids are, what his job is. God knows he'd do it for me if I ever get Alzheimer's. Deficits; I'll help him get stronger. I'll get him back into the OR.

I walk to his room and he's hooked up to a vent and there's bandages over his head. I begin to cry. But he's alive. He's here. My children have a father. I have a husband. The ICU is quiet. It's a scary place to be. But he's here, he's not going anywhere. He's safe. He's alive.