Had I known How to Save a Life

Back To Normal

Chapter 48
*Meredith POV*

The day you find out you've been diagnosed with something that requires treatment, the only thing you pray for is for things to go back to normal. After, you win the highest award a surgeon could ever earn, things may never go back to normal. Sometimes the new feeling is just the change you needed, other times, you want to go back to the day before everything happened.

It was 1 week ago that Derek and Cristina both won the Harper Avery. The hospital was ecstatic, they were ecstatic, everyone was. And now we can't really get a break from everyone.

People call for Derek everyday hoping to get a lecture or whatever.

I was on call all night so I never went home but Derek should be in soon. Before the manhunt comes to GS.

*April POV*

I'm at 28 weeks and exhausted. I can't wait for the twins to get here, to see my little Allison and James. Jackson rolls around in bed and wraps his arms around my belly. "Still kicking?" He asks.

"Never stop," I laugh. "It doesn't help that there's two of them in there." I add.

"We're almost there. Just one more trimester. Then we'll have a little boy and girl." He smiles with his pretty green eyes.

*Jo POV*

"What do you think it is?" I ask Alex.

"What do you mean?" He asks me.

"Boy or girl?" I say.

"I don't know, we'll find out when your like 20 weeks. You're only at 10." He says.

I still can't believe we're having a baby. I mean 15 years ago when I was living in my car, had someone told me I'd have the life I have today, I'd think they're crazy.

I eat a bunch of pizza for breakfast. And then the morning sickness kicks in and I sprint to the bathroom.

Alex comes running in, "2 more weeks and that part ends." He reminds me. He hands me a wash cloth to wipe face and he holds my hair up.

I think my stomach has finally settled down. I clean myself up and smile at Alex. "What?" He laughs?

"Nothing. Just thinking you're going to make a great daddy." I say.

*Meredith POV*

I'm about to go onto rounds. I see a man in a suit who looks lost and confused. He makes eye contact with me and then looks relieved. "Ah, Dr. Grey? Correct?" He asks.

"Yes, sir. Can I help you with something?" I ask. Is he here for my research?! I think quickly.

"I was wondering where I could find your husband, Dr. Shepherd. Do you know where he is?" He asks me. Reasons why not to assume good things.

"I have no idea where he is." I say as I begin to walk off.

"How don't you know where he is?" He asks quickly.

"Because he's a surgeon. I'm a surgeon. He could be at home, or at the daycare, or in the OR." I say in a pissy sarcastic tone.

I walk to the nurses station and see Callie and Bailey. "What was that all about Grey?" Bailey asks me.

"People looking for Derek for his research." I say.

"Oh don't worry, it'll go back to normal sooner or later." She says.

Callie adds, "Oh it'll be a while, I was chased down after my TED conference and that's not even close to winning a Harper Avery."

"That doesn't help," I tell her.

Maggie walks up to join the conversation, "Hey Mer, there's people looking for Derek down the hall."

"They can find him on their own." I say as I walk off and head to my patients room.

Edwards and Ben are my residents today. Ben is presenting, "Jared Lions, 33 years old, diagnosed with stage 2 pancreatic cancer."

"Mr. Lions do you have any questions?" I ask him.

"Not really. Just can't wait for life to go back to normal." He says.

"If all goes well, it should." I tell him.

I pass Derek in the hall and he smiles and pulls me into an on call room, I'm basically sitting on him as we start kissing.

Right as we get into it, his pager beeps. More people want to meet Derek about the Harper Avery stuff.

"God, I can't wait for things to just go back to normal." He complains.

"Yeah, me too." I say.

"We're going to finish this tonight okay?" He smiles.

I get ready for surgery. Edwards is scrubbing in. We get in there and I make the first cut.

Thankfully for this guy, I think we caught it early enough. We'll just have to wait and see.

Once we actually get in there we stop for a moment. "This is way worse than what the CT showed." Edwards says.

"Warren scrub in, we need all the hands we can get." I tell him.

The tumor has wrapped itself around the pancreas. The only way to get the whole thing is to take the panaceas with it.

"What now?" Edwards asks.

"We think of a way not to make this man lose his pancreas, resulting him to be an insulin dependent diabetic for the rest of his life." I say in a serious voice.

"Dr. Grey, I think removing it is our best option. I mean either remove as much as we can leaving some there ready to re grow. Or we remove the pancreas." Ben says.

"You're right." I say sadly.

After surgery, I go to the waiting room and find his wife. "Mrs. Lions, we successfully removed the tumor ." I begin.

Her face sighs in relief. I need to finish. "Unfortunately, in doing so, it required us to remove the whole pancreas. So, Jared is now diabetic." I say.

"Oh God. But he's gonna be okay right? Like he can live with this?" She asks with just the smallest shred of hope in her eyes.

"Yes, diabetes is very manageable and he should be able to have the same life he had before." I tell her.

I head back to the lounge and get ready to leave. We're all making small talk and then suddenly April gasps loudly.

"Hey what's wrong?!" Jackson asks immediately.

"Just a stupid small contraction." She says.

"I can't wait for this to go back to normal." She follows up.

"It only gets worse," I laugh as I head out the door.

"Not helping!" She yells. 

I meet up with Derek, he has the kids. I pick up Bailey as he carries Ellis and holds Zola's hand.

We're almost out the door when I hear a familiar voice, "Meredith?" He asks.

Oh God...what does he want?

Maybe life isn't supposed to go back to normal. Maybe you're meant to live with the change. As humans we're supposed to adapt. But the hard part is whether you want to or not.