Had I known How to Save a Life

How Do I Fix This

Chapter 57
*Meredith POV*
3 Weeks Later

All our lives we fight. With strangers, with the ones we love. It's inevitable that there's going to be fights. It's human nature, we fight until there's no fight left in us. It's the heat of the moment that kills us, the things we say to one another trying to knock them down. The thing is, how far are you willing to hurt the person you love the most, to prove your point.

I walk into the kitchen finding my kids throwing food at each other. Ellis is crying. Zola is screaming. Bailey is laughing. "Derek Bailey Shepherd! Stop throwing things at your sister!"

"Ooh she went all full name!" Zola laughs.

How do I fix this?

*Jo POV*

We are married. And he never bothered to tell me he could have babies with his ex-wife. What is life honestly? This is madness.

I walk into the bedroom, where I see Alex getting changed. "I know that you know," he laughs. How does he know? Did he see me with it? Did he want me to find it?

"And what is it that I know...?" I ask confused. "The sex? Of our baby...? Last week I got paged and I forgot to ask cause I was so caught up. Boy or girl?" He says smiling walking up to me putting his hands on waist.

Oh that. For like 5 minutes I forgot I'm having a baby.

"Why are you being so weird?" Alex asks. "We..uh..can we talk?" I ask him and my heart begins to beat harder.

"Everything's alright, right? With you?" He begins, he places his hand on my stomach and nervously  says, "The baby is is okay right?"

"Yeah nothing's wrong in that department..." I say. I pull the paper out, "I know it's none of my business...but I found this...you had other kids? With Izzie. Your ex wife." I say.

"Oh that? You just throw that away, it's nothing." He says.

"Nothing? You have other kids, with your ex wife?" I ask accusingly.

"What? No, don't you think I'd of told you that already, you know like before that night I told you I loved you?" He says.

I don't know why but it still angers me that I'm just now finding out about this, "You could still have kids though, were you ever planning on telling me that?"

"Jo what the hell?" He says.

"I have to go to work, I'll see you tonight!" He storms out without even a look back.

*Meredith POV*

I get my little hellions to stop fighting finally. They almost never fight which is a relief.

I walk by an on call room and see Alex and Jo fighting once again. This time it's harsh and they're both yelling.

I ignore it and carry on with my day. Wilson is on my service so I'll here about it later. If not from her then from Alex.

She's late to rounds. We have a 2 day surgery for a mass tumor removal.

"Nice of you to join us Wilson," I say.

"I apologize Dr. Grey. It won't happen again." She says. I can hear the shakiness in her voice. Whatever fight they had must've been a bad one.

"Sandra's tumors are massive, but benign. Which means they're isolated." I say to the residents.

The surgery is going to take two days because there's going to be a lot of blood loss and there's 3 tumors.

I get a page from the daycare. Bailey is throwing Legos at kids. Come on, not again.

I don't understand what is with this day. Everyone's fighting. Well, not everyone...but an abnormally greater amount.

"Jo, cut it out! It was a long time ago. I thought I knew what I wanted." I hear Alex yell from the on call room.

There's silence after that. "What are you saying then?" Jo asks.

"I thought I wanted the whole marriage and kids—" he stops himself. "That's not what I meant, and you know that Jo."

He's really digging himself a hole. They keep fighting. They both have valid points. And they both are right. That's the thing though. At what point do you swallow your pride and stop fighting?

They keep going at it. Almost like how Derek and I fought about DC, the difference is this is kind of bigger than that.

The fighting continues and then I hear Jo start to cry...I peak my head by the window and see Alex trying to console her. "Stop it, Alex! I knew exactly what you meant."

"I didn't mean it like that, please Jo, I'm sorry." He says to her.

I walk away quickly before he sees that I've been listening. I get ready for the surgery. Jo walks into the scrub room on the verge of a mental breakdown, from the way she looks.

"You okay Wilson?" Hoping I get any explanation of how that argument even started.

"I..uh...I just don't know anymore to be honest.

"Just keep your head above the water." I tell her.

We get into surgery and begin the next 12 hours of our day. If these tumors were malignant, this poor woman would've been dead. She's lucky they're benign. Not lucky enough, though, cause these tumors are smart.

But we're smarter.

Day one of the surgery is successful. And we're all good to go tomorrow. Jo quickly walks out of the scrub room, still looking like she's in the verge of a breakdown.

I see Derek in the hallway and we make a V-line to the on call room. We haven't had sex in 2 weeks. So we had this planned.

If anyone ever says you'll never have sex again once you have kids, they're lying. You make time to make love with your spouse.

*Alex POV*

How do I fix this? I hurt Jo. And I never ever wanted to hurt her. I'm not the type of guy that prays. But right now, I'm praying like hell.

When all is said and done, when the shots are done being fired, when the damage is all done; how do you fix what's been broken? How do you take back what's been said?

Author Note:

Omg. Writing that fight scene was so hard (and I fully acknowledge that it sucks btw). It'll make sense in the next chapter though. I might edit it in the future to make it a better argument idk. What do you think will happen to Alex and Jo?? (Also, I totally used the idea for this argument from the beginning of season 12).