My Coloured Zulu Man

Chapter 44

Siyabonga

I go by the name of Siyabonga Gumede 29 years of age, a bachelor with women issues. I run my fathers business, just a string of clubs and butcheries. Which i now have my own, my father goes by the name of Steve Gumede, he's white, and growing up i never understood how he has a black surname yet he's white,  turns out he was adopted by a Gumede family, most people mistake me for a coloured person, but i myself don't really know, I'd assume my mother is black. I don't know her, i was raised by Steve, he's explanation was that my mother died giving birth to me, and i don't have her photo's.
I reside in Cape Town with my family, but lately I've been  running around Jozi, i am trying to expand business in Gauteng. Gauteng is for business after all, I met Amahle at a club, and I'd say that i fell in love with her. I wouldn't call it love-love but i did there's just something about her that pulls you close to her, her warmth, her energy. It's everything, she's beautiful and attractive, I'd say that she's everyone's type, but she's not for me.
My life has never been smooth, i had money, had everything i wanted but i was fighting demons. Myself. I never told anyone not even my dad knows, and when i told my therapist she said am crazy, here's how i got a therapist. It started on the night before  my seventh birthday, i turned into a beast, a animal, only i know, I'd change every night. It happened for 15 years, until i taught myself on how to control it, I'd scream every night, so that's when Steve called in a therapist. I've had Rose as my therapist since then, everytime I'd tell her about it she would say that it's my imaginations, and its a normal thing for a person to have those, so i thought it was normal for everyone to have an animal with them, until it wasn't normal.
At 17 i had attended a school camp for   the year 11, we had met with other schools, and at that time i wasn't able to control it, so I'd run to a far away place to let it out, and be back by morning, for fours years i did that, it was a yearly camp, which was compulsory for every leaner of my school to attend.
It was on the 21st of March the clock was about to hit midnight, i ran off the camp site, just a kilometer away from everyone, it went out, with my age it grew, it was a normal thing nothing scared me i remember climbing a tree, getting at the top, thats when i heard someone screaming for help, my instinct were shut i watched my beast run to the scene i couldn't control it, a girl naked, with a man on top of her. Rape if you could say, she was screming for help.
My first and last victim, and he unfortunately never lived to tell his story, i watched myself as i ripped his heart off his chest until there was nothing but his bones.
The killer was never found, it was open and shut case, a wild animal killed him. The girl testified for it, everyone question how was it possible that she was alive, a question she didn't have answers to.
I wanted to turn myself in to the police, but how, it wasn't me it was beast, he lives inside me, and even if so they would never believe me.
That's when i knew that this thing i have isn't normal.
A secret no one knows, one that i will die with.
I have girl problems, no one interest me, I'd do it for the sex and that's it. I am of mariaggeble age, at this age i should have a girlfriend but no i don't.
I had expected to feel something for Amahle,but no i didn't i do have something for her, but it's not what i wanted to feel.
Until then we will be friends, meeting her she had issues with her boyfriend, she still has she hasn't moved on from  him. Amazing how nice.
Coming here to Gauteng i wanted air, space to breath. I had just found out that Steve who is my father is not my biological father. How.
I never questioned him, he's white, my mother is black, so i get it why my complexion is not the same as his. Him and my stepmother have been trying for a child, it turns out he can't have children at all which questioned my existence, and it's been alcohol ever since.
He then told me the real story about my mother, she was a hooker they met at a hotel, had a thing for a night and they went separate ways, a year later she shows up with a white baby, so it was obvious i was his. No DNA test were needed.
I've hired private investigators to look for a woman called Beatrice Simthandile Zulu. My mother that.