Tears Of London

The Bird part 1

ERIN

It has been a long time since I've been on stage. Straighten up in front of people. Friends, acquainted ones, strangers. Showing them all I have. Showing them all I am. A voice. A song.
The E1 Club. In a sum up, it was owned by Malcolm's uncle, who rented us the stage sometimes.
For that night, I had chosen to sing my own song. It was the first time I was singing a song I wrote in front of many people. But it's not my first song. I wrote this one three days ago. I was inspired that day.
I remember how much I hesitated to go live, but I was feeling ready that night.
It was late when the Dj left.
- It's your turn, sweetheart ! yells Eves, the Dj. The mic is ready.
She handed me the microphone without taking her hands off it.
- Watch out for the cable, it's broken on the corner. You see ? Right here. You're likely to get a decharge or two from time to time. Good luck, sweetheart.
I took the mic like a young soldier takes a rifle. Clumsily, but willingly. I found something sexy in this heavy stuff. Something like power.
Suddenly, the music Eves was mixing stopped, and a silence landed.
Every people in this fucking night club is watching me. I was doing all I could to hide my trembling. I was pressing my hand so hard against the microphone that my fingers turned white.
- MUSIC !!! a man on the front row yelled at me.
I took a deep breath and raised my head to face the crowd.

"Can you see ? it won't mean a thing to me
I've been doing this too long, baby girl, l've felt it all"

Without realising it, I started to sing. It sounded weird at the beginning, until I find the right tone and volume.

"So watch out if you try to play your luck
Ain't nobody gonna care enough to catch you fall"

More at ease, I get ready for the chorus :

"So don't you fall in love,
don't make me make you fall in love Don't make me make you fall in love with a nigga like me
Nobody needs to fall in love
I swear l'm just a bird, girl, I'm just another bird
Don't make me make you fall in love with a nigga like me, like me."

When I finished the final melody, the crowd surprisingly started to applause. That sound was so pleasant I thought I was going to cry. It made me feel powerful. High. Even higher than drug could make me feel.
I want to feel like this for the rest of my life.
- WOW, BROTHER ! Malcolm screamed when I got out of the stage, excited. Did you see them ? Did you see their faces ?
Malcolm was even looking as excited as me.
- Fuck, Erin !! he exclaimed, joyful. Did you see their fucking faces ?! They were like, hypnotised, all eyes on you.
- I know, that was dope. I feel stoned.
My friend had a loud and happy laugh, before slapping me on my shoulder.
- We're going to make it, he declared. We'll have it all. Fame, cars, money, parties...all of it will be ours !
Then, I realised. I realised how much I wanted it to become true. How much I wanted to sing for them, everyday, every night. Music became my goal. For the first time in my life, I had a real goal.
It's what I want to do.
Who I want to be.
I want to make art.
I want to be an artist.
I was in a good mood until I saw that number calling me on my phone.