사랑시 (Twinkling Watermelon ff)

4. Let's not give up

Ha Eungyeol

Don't get distracted by other things.

Those words were stuck inside my mind since yesterday. I had just gotten into a band. I had just started to feel alive. But the timing was awfully bad. 

Earlier this morning, I informed the SPINE9 brothers that I won't be able to perform tomorrow. It was such a great chance to show myself, but everything was so messed up. I was frustrated and exhausted. The wrath inside me was slowly subsiding, just like I was giving up my desire, my dream.

But then I received the guitar I was dying for six years ago, and the fact grandpa kept it for me felt like the universe was trying to help me. Yet, I was still feeling unsure about everything.

What should I do?

Should I give up?

“Ha Eungyeol?”

I stood up from the bench up as I heard Yi-joo's voice. Her eyes glistened.

Was she crying because of me?

“Yeon Yi-joo? What are you-”

She raced towards me, hugging me, “I thought something happened to you”

For the first time today, a small laugh left my mouth while I rested my chin over her head, wrapping my arms around her.

“Brave of you to think something will happen to me when Yi-joo is searching for me crying like a baby”

“But what the hell happened to you? Why aren't you picking up your-”, she paused when her eyes fell on a guitar,”This-”

“Grandpa kept it for me”, I took a seat as I patted besides me, monitoring her to take a seat as well. I took my handkerchief and gave it to her.

“This is embarrassing”, she let out a chuckle, wiping out her tears.

Yeon Yi-joo

It's been six years since she came into our lives. She was the first person with whom I talked heart-to-heart. She was my first friend. Furthermore, she never pitied me like others do when they find out that I'm a CODA. I still remember the day she asked me to teach her sign language, just because she wanted to get close to my family. Everyone in my family adored her. She was the closest thing I had after my family.

“So, tell me what's up?” She looked at me.

“Living a life that makes my heart beat, or living a life as a trophy for my dad. Whichever I choose, my heart aches because of the other option I didn't choose. I'm not happy”, I honestly opened up to her because I trusted her more than myself.

Yi-joo scoffed.

“What was that for?” I was lost, her reaction was unexpected.

“How come you are so fucking relatable all the time? You know what happened to me in the last 48 hours?” She had this unexplainable expression on her face as she continued, “My agency stole my song”

“What-”

“That's why I went to the police station. But the officer said that I need to have connections and money”

“That's why you said that you want to get rich”

“Yup, that was cheesy, though. I cringe thinking about that again”, she laughed at her words.

Only Yi-joo could do that, laughing in such a serious situation.

“So? What about your song?”

She explained how she left the agency and got into MJ Entertainments. The same agency which the SPINE9 brothers were talking about.

“But what about your mom?” I remember her telling about how her mother hated music.

“I don't know”, she sighed.

“But...”, She held my hands with hers, caressing them, “Aren't they our family? Won't they understand? If we show how genuine we are, how much it means to us and how happy we are doing music? It's not like we are doing something bad”

My mind started to process her words.

“Let us not give up, 'kay?”

I'm so blessed to have you, Yeon Yi-joo.