Musings on Life from a Dead Girl

Bullet

It would take eating a bullet for you to realize
To walk in front of a car
Cast myself down a flight of stairs
Only then would it click in your sad little mind that I suffer
That this is more than an inconvenience to you
That I am more than a burden placed on your shoulders
That my pain is real
It would take eating a bullet
Swallowing a bottle of pills
Jumping from a bridge
Fileting myself wide
For any of you to get it
This is not for show
Not some sick trend I am a part of
If all I wanted was your attention then why do I only cry when you aren't around
Hurt myself where you cant see
Why do I hide
Tell me that
Tell me this isn't real when you only see my best parts and still call me a mess
It is a sickness that you tell me isn't real
You tell me to get over it
Do you even know what it feels like to live while dead?
To die while alive
To live as a ghost of yourself while everyone looks at you like you are weak
Do you realize what it is like?
No
Of course not
It would take for me to eat a bullet for you to realize that this wound isn't imaginary