A Little Bit Human (Erwin x OC)

37: Hurt and Broken

A/N:

I wasn't going to update yet and make you guys have to sit a little longer on that cliff hanger, but I can't help it. So here's a shorter chapter to give you guys something to read before Monday.

As she breathed in and out her ribs screamed out in pain. Lillian's eyes attempted to open, but she was still too tired. She opened her eyes just enough to see what was directly in front of her. A hand held onto hers. Was it her own hand? No. It was a larger hand wrapped around her hand.

"Erwin." She forced herself to whisper.

"Lily." She heard Erwin shuffle, then felt his hand on the side of her face. They must be alone for him to do this.

"Erwin." The thought of looking at her husband forced Lillian to open her eyes all the way. The blinds were pulled closed, but it was clearly the middle of the day by how much light was flooding through the cracks. "Erwin." She said again, trying to sit up.

"Don't move." He grabbed her hand and kissed it. "How are you feeling?"

"Sore." Lillian leaned back down into the pillows. "How long have I been out?"

"Almost a whole day. Luckily we got to you before you lost too much blood."

"I'm so sorry Erwin." Tears stung her already tired eyes. "I let you down. I couldn't protect Eren."

"Eren is fine. He is set to be given back to the Military Police, but he's still in our care, so I'm more worried about you." Erwin moved a strand of hair out of her face.

"What exactly happened?"

"The person who cut you down was the Female Titan. She killed all of Levi's squad then almost captured Eren. Levi and Mikasa were able to get him back from her." Erwin chuckled. "In fact Mikasa was actually the one who carried you back."

"Mikasa did?" Lillian gasped, causing her wound to sting.

"She doesn't hate you as much as you thought." Erwin studied her face for a moment. Her thin lips were pulled in a grimace she wasn't hiding very well, her hair had come out of its braid and was knotted in some spots, her dark green eyes were bloodshot with dark circles under them. Even like this she was still the most beautiful woman Erwin had ever seen. He sometimes forgot that he was lucky enough for her to choose him. She could have had anyone, but she chose him. She chose to love a devil like him.

"I'm sorry Lillian." Erwin dipped his head down; he couldn't look at her. He let go of her hand and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Why? It's not your fault this happened darling." Lillian reached out to touch him, but Erwin was too far out of her reach.

"It is." Erwin's tired eyes looked up at her. "I knew that the Female Titan was just like Eren, and she used the other titans as a distraction. And without even telling you that, I let you go out without knowing."

Lillian chuckled. It hurt but she still did it. "My love, do you want to hear what someone told me years ago?" Erwin leaned in, letting Lillian touch him. She smoothed down the hair he had ruined. "There was this section commander that had a stick up his ass, he helped me when I felt like I lost everything. He told me that my friend's deaths weren't my fault, they were the titans. And I don't blame my injury on anyone but the Female Titan, and myself. Because I know I'm better than getting cut open like this." Lillian frowned. "I'm just tired, Erwin."

"You should sleep then darling. You lost a decent amount of blood." Erwin leaned up and kissed her cheek.

When Lillian said that she was tired, she didn't mean because of her injury. She meant of being a Scout. But she knew how quick Erwin would discharge her, so she kept her mouth shut. 

"I liked that story. Perhaps I should tell you the story of a section commander who fell head over heels for a thug."

"I would like to hear it." Lillian smiled at first, but soon it disappeared. "But I need to know where Levi is. If all of his squad is dead that means he can't be doing well." Lillian wanted to shed a few tears herself.

The door slowly creaked open, and Levi was in the doorway. He looked just as tired as the rest of them, if not more tired.

"Erwin, would you mind giving us a minute?" Lillian asked. Erwin nodded and slipped past out the door behind Levi. He closed the door behind him.

"Are you ok?" Levi asked, his voice cracking. Lillian tried not to be scared, but she wanted to cry. She had never seen Levi look so broken. When someone was always so strong and brave it was scary to see them so beaten down and broken.

"I'm fine." Lillian patted the spot of the bed next to her. "Please sit with me."

Levi nodded, and sat next to her. Although it hurt, Lillian sat up and pulled her brother into a hug. She didn't say anything when she felt hot tears start to fall on her back, and felt Levi trembling in her embrace. Now she felt like the older sibling. She kissed Levi's head and stroked his hair.

"It's ok, it's ok." Lillian repeated over and over. Even if it wasn't. Honestly, Lillian was mostly saying those words for herself. It was scary to see "Humanity's Strongest Soldier" break down like a green eared cadet.

After a while Levi pulled away from Lillian while hiding his face. Lillian didn't want him to feel ashamed, but she didn't know what to say to make him feel better.

"How's your foot?" Is what she said instead.

Levi smiled, happy that Lillian didn't make more of the situation. "It's my ankle, and it's fine. I'm sure you're probably in more pain than me."

Lillian chuckled hoarsely. She slowly leaned back down into her pile of pillows. "I am."

"I'm sorry if I was hugging you too tight." Levi looked away from her again.

"You're fine." Lillian reached out and squeezed his hand. "I'm sorry Levi."

"Thank you." Levi leaned down and kissed the side of her face. "I love you."

"I love you too." Lillian shifted a bit and immediately regretted it. Pain shot through her body. "I have a question."

"What?"

"How's Eren?"

Levi chuckled. "He's asleep right now."

"I want to see him. And Mikasa, I want to thank her."

"Before you see anyone, you should sleep more. You can try and hide it all you want, but I can tell you're in pain."

The door creaked open again, this time Hange and Mike coming in with Erwin trailing behind them. She was happy to see her friends, but her eyelids were starting to get heavy.

"I'm sorry Lily, these two forced me to let them in."

"That's ok, I like these distractions."

Mike and Hange both looked down at her with wide eyes and worried expressions on their faces. Hange leaned down and kissed Lillian on the forehead, Mike grabbed her hand and squeezed it once before letting go. They were acting like she almost died. She didn't think her injury was that bad.

"If you want a distraction you can listen to my new theories." Hange had that mad look in her eyes.

"Lily should be getting more sleep." Erwin piped up.

"No offense Lil, but you do look like shit." Mike said. "Get some rest."

Lillian smiled as she closed her eyes and fell asleep.