𝓛𝓮𝓸𝓷 𝓚𝓮𝓷𝓷𝓮𝓭𝔂| ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴇꜱ ʙᴏᴏᴋ 4

Bottle Cap Promises| Request

AN: This request follows Y/N and Leon, who's relationship is already rocky due to Leon's newfound coping mechanism of drinking his problems away. When Y/N's sick and has to pick up her fiancé from the bar, it's the final straw. A year or so later, the pair bump into each other again, and this time Leon's a changed man, and wants Y/N back. 

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I yawn, blindly I reach out to seek more warmth since the covers have slipped off of me during yet another fitful night of sleep, yet my fingers only tangle in cold sheets and an empty space. I open my eyes, blinking against the dim dawn darkness only to remember that I'm alone- I have been for over a year now. I roll onto my back, instinctively my fingers go to toy with my engagement ring, but yet again I get reminded of the lack of fiancé. I stare up at the ceiling, tears pricking against my eyes but I blink them away, I'm fed up of crying over a man who never deserved me, but the yearning in my heart screams at me to quit trying to be so strong for an invisible audience. My jaw aches as I hold in my cries, God knows I've spent more than enough nights and mornings sobbing my little heart out over Leon and the life we could've had together. I understand why he turned to drink, his missions were getting harsher, and the casualties became too many, but if he needed comfort so badly, why didn't he open his arms to me? 

I guess he didn't need comfort, he only needed to forget for a while. And I was forgotten along with the deceased comrades and failed civilians when Leon drank, so much so that it led to our breakup. It was just over a year ago, when we'd been at the peak of our relationship. Leon had proposed only a couple months beforehand, and we were in the midst of planning our wedding as well as our future family- we even tried a few times, but no luck. I didn't think anything would break us apart, but then Leon came back one time from a mission he never dared to speak of, and he was a changed man. His once vibrant blue eyes felt dull and dark, clouded with guilt and despair, his jokes vanished from the Earth, and his soft smile was now replaced with a constant frown, as if nothing in the world made him happy anymore. I initially let him be, I knew sometimes he'd have phases where he needed to deal with things alone, so I figured that was one of those times, but then the drinking began. At first it was just a couple of beers after a hard day, I barely batted an eyelash, but then it became daily, then he spent more time drinking than he did talking to me. The promises we'd made to each other withered and died, along with the intimacy and connection. 

It was one night, when I was sick with some kind of flu, when things finally reached the point of breaking. For a few days I'd been bedbound, coughing and sneezing with painful headaches and worse muscle aches. I didn't know where Leon had disappeared to, at this point he'd leave me for hours just to go out to the bar instead of wallowing at home, I guess in that way he was doing me a favour by keeping his sadness to himself. It was in the middle of the night when I got the call from some random bartender a few towns over, asking if I'd come pick up my drunken mess of a fiancé. Leon and I didn't have anyone to turn to, and I'd hated the idea of bothering anyone about this anyway, so with a heavy heart and even heavier feet, I'd gathered all my strength to get out of bed, get dressed then drive an hour away to pick up Leon. Looking back, I should've just left him there, but I couldn't do that, not when he was incoherent and at risk of hurting himself. 

Driving to the bar was a nightmare with my blurred vision and weak limbs, but weaving through the crowds of people and finally dragging Leon's stumbling ass back to the car? I'd never had a harder workout. Leon barely recognised me at that point, he was all frowns and babbling about his mission and the people he'd let down. I wanted to comfort him, but I wasn't in the right mindset, so instead I snapped at him. I shoved him away, voice cracking as I finally decided I'd had enough. The drive home was silent, but I knew Leon was awake and sobered up, his eyes kept sneaking peeks at me as he opened and closed his mouth, no apologies or excuses coming out. I ignored him until we got home, when I helped him nurse his hangover whilst battling my own illness, I crouched by the toilet, wiping my own sweat and fever whilst rubbing Leon's back and making sure he didn't choke on his own vomit. The next morning he never thanked me, whether it be from embarrassment or forgetfulness, Leon just acted the same as usual, the only kind thing he did for me was leave out a mug of lukewarm coffee beside the bed.