𝓛𝓮𝓸𝓷 𝓚𝓮𝓷𝓷𝓮𝓭𝔂| ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴇꜱ ʙᴏᴏᴋ 4

Restlessness Resolved

Leon peacefully sleeps next to me, his mouth slightly parted as small snores escape from him. I watch, like I have been for the last hour or so, glad that at least one of us can be a functioning human tomorrow. I never do well without a good night's sleep, I've always had trouble going to sleep, but once I'm out I usually stay that way until morning. Every so often I'll get restless nights, where I'm physically unable to fall asleep despite being tired enough to do so. It's like my brain won't switch off, I'll think and think, foot tapping and wriggling, then I'll toss and turn, bunching up the covers or tossing them off of me. Leon stirs as I sit up with a frustrated sigh, it's not fair for me to keep risking waking him up. I pad out of the bedroom as quietly as I can, seeking out something to do. 

My eyes roam our small apartment, I debate watching TV but already I'm glad to have not woken my light sleeper of a boyfriend up. I'm not going to manage to do any work, so instead I opt for rummaging through Leon's bookshelf. I've got my own books, but if I start one of them I know sleep won't even be an option. I choose one of the classics Leon likes, then I settle onto the sofa, grabbing a blanket before cosying up and starting the book. My eyes feel heavy as I try to take in the old English and peculiar dialogue, the characters aren't much better when it comes to understanding their personalities, I've got no idea how Leon even reads these things. I yawn, wondering if my body will finally give me that drowsy feeling, but then it passes, and I'm still left sleepy yet mentally awake. My mood isn't helping either, the more annoyed I get about not being able to sleep only coaxes my body into getting stressed and staying awake. It's a vicious circle. 

The light sound of footsteps draws me out of one of Heathcliff's dialogues. I look up to see Leon stood next to the sofa, hair mussed up and eyes squinted at me, he tilts his head ever so slightly as if checking to see if I'm ill or upset. "Sweetheart, why're you awake? Is something wrong?" He sleepily mumbles, rubbing his eyes as he slumps next to me on the sofa. I shake my head, not bothering to bookmark the novel as I set it on the coffee table and nestle into Leon's open arm. 

"Just can't sleep. Felt a bit restless and I didn't want to wake you." I explain, voice scratchy from being silent for so long. Leon nods, understanding since he's seen me experience these sleepless nights before. Leon kisses the side of my head as I sigh, leaning into his warmth, I didn't realise I was cold until he came along and provided some heat. 

"I've got something that can help, just wait here for me." Leon murmurs, getting up as I fall against the pillows. I watch as he stretches his arms above his head, his pyjamas riding up to show me the V of his hips. I lick my lips, glad that I got at least something out of being awake. Leon disappears into the kitchen as I wait, the living room dead silent apart from my breathing and the faint sounds of the never sleeping city, I almost feel nostalgic about the coincidence. Before I know it, Leon comes back with a warm mug of...something, carefully he passes it to me before perching back on the sofa. "It's warm milk with a hint of vanilla since I know you're not keen on the plain flavour, it should help, or at least I hope it will. My mother used to give me the same thing when I couldn't sleep, then she'd rub my back or play with my hair until I fell asleep." He fondly says, smile lifting the edge of his lips at the reminiscent memories. I smile, placing a hand over his as I sip the drink. It turns out to taste quite nice, so much so that it soon disappears. 

"You can go back to bed you know, I don't want to keep you up." I softly murmur, another yawn pulling at my mouth. Leon watches me, shrugging up a shoulder as he pats his thighs. 

"I know I could, but I'd rather be with you. Late nights are fun and sometimes therapeutic, but they can also be lonely and thought provoking." He replies as I lie down on the sofa, resting my head in his lap so I'm facing his stomach. His hands find their way into my hair as I let out a contented sigh, already the feeling of being cared for and almost nurtured feels good. His fingers lightly scratch my scalp whilst also playing with the strands, if I were a cat I'd be purring by now. "Speaking of," He adds, "is there anything on your mind that's keeping you awake? You can tell me anything, even if you think it doesn't matter." 

My heart warms at his kindness and generosity, he's sacrificing sleep just to comfort me, I couldn't have wished for a better boyfriend. Coming to think of it, there are a few things that I keep thinking of, so I admit my stupid worries to Leon as he listens and continues to massage my head, lulling me into a sleepy state- or at least sleepier than I was. When I'm done, I feel so much more lighter, like my troubles have been shouldered and unleashed from the confines of my mind. Leon gently gives me advice, telling me that everything will work out the way it should and how some things are out of my control, and all I can do is focus on my reactions and how I deal with them. I nod, even though I kind of knew that it still feels good to have someone guide me. I can feel myself on the verge of sleep, my eyes are so heavy now and I keep almost drifting off, but one thing occurs to me that makes me feel guilty. 

"I'm falling asleep." I state. 

Leon lightly chuckles, "I'm glad sweetheart." He pulls the fluffy blanket over my body, giving me the ultimate comfort and cosiness. 

I huff, reaching out to tug on his pyjama tee playfully. "But what about you? Don't you need to go back to bed and lie down, you're going to be stuck with me on you." 

Leon hums as if in thought, then I briefly see him shrug as he smiles, resuming the head scratches. "I don't mind, just stay there and get some sleep Y/N, don't worry about me, I've slept in worse positions." I've got to energy to argue, so I nod and close my eyes, so close to falling asleep now. As if knowing I need the final push, Leon soothingly begins talking to me about the book I was reading, recounting a childhood memory of reading past his bedtime and learning the lesson of losing sleep over a good novel. If I was awake I'd laugh with him, understanding the pull of fiction and stories, but I'm fast asleep now on Leon's lap, my restlessness resolved.