The misadventures of a Main Character [Complete]

XVII - How heroes party

So they partied, with the most bodacious women Main had ever seen. Everything became a boozy haze in the loud music and strobing lights. Gregory used his flame breath to entertain the masses, and to roast marsh-mellows for the village children. 

Buttercup slurred her new hit: 

"The herro-hic-Main, he used to be a pain, but look how far he's came! The prophecy's plain: he's not mundane. Our heroic hero-" She paused, and the whole crowd joined together to holler the chorus; "MACGYVER ANDREW IGNES NEVERMORE CATHARTY HABARDEEN ASTROPHY REGALI ANDRE CAPPER TERENCE EVERDALE RECTIMINE!"

When Main came to his senses, he noticed two things. One: He was no longer thirteen. And two: he was in the middle of a desert.

*

"What do you know?" Main muttered, immediately noticing how deep his voice suddenly sounded. "I was right when I told Buttercup I could magically change age in an instant."

Speaking of Buttercup, where was she? Had she and Gregory vanished? What kind of party had that been, anyhow? And why was Main drinking booze if he'd still been thirteen?!

All were questions that weighed heavily on Main's mind. He stood, and began to walk.

*

Buttercup groaned, and clapped a hand to her forehead. What had happened last night? The whole night had blurred passed. But that was impossible, she'd been drinking orange juice the whole night, hadn't she? Her fingers scraped something soft and spiky. What the? Buttercup shrieked, as she realized her hair had cut shockingly short.

"Morning darling," a voice at the door said.

"Dad?!"