The misadventures of a Main Character [Complete]

XXXVI - "I dibs his blood!"

The fan-girl and Typo were engulfed by an oddly sparkly, orange flash. All that remained was shreds of paper, and a kidney-shaped puddle of blood. Main shook his head at the mess, which Mr. Trotter had begun to lap at. 

Main said: "We need a game plan; if you were a cowardly, potential-murderer, where would you shelter?"

"In weather like this? The first creepily abandoned cottage I came too," Helena said. She looked around. "Oh."

There was a poorly concealed sneeze from the kitchen pantry.

*

Main looked towards the kitchen, then back at Helena. He beckoned the undead fan-girl forwards. Cautiously, the pair advanced towards the still coughing pantry, weapons at the ready and Mr. Trotter prepared to unleash the beast.

Silently counting to three, Main flung open the pantrydoor. The Bevan inside squeaked.

"Oh, Main!" he exclaimed. "You! Uh...you found me!"

"Where's Buttercup?" Main demanded.

*

"She's up at the castle, Main. At the graveyard? Remember how Greg killed her and all?" His beady eyes flicked between him and Helena. He started rambling. "-So I guess you know that Greg's innocent, and that does make me look guilty, but I'm not, I promise! Implicated, maybe; caught in that crazy wheel of fate perhaps; but I did it because I loved you. I mean, I still love you but-"

Main shook Bevan roughly by his shirt lapels. "Stop playing the pronoun game! We've been trying to find out what 'it' is for far too long!" He sighed. "My brain hurts. First of all, why are you tied up?"

Bevan blushed. "The Sentry thought I would make a good meal."

"What did you do to Buttercup then?" he demanded.

"I'm beginning to think you have a hearing problem. I never did anything to her. Honestly."

"Then how are you implicated?" Helena cut in. "And answer precisely, or I'll dissect you piece by wretched piece."

"I dibs his blood!" Harry Trotter squealed.

"What?" Main asked, glaring at the pig with suspiciously long fangs, whose cloak's edges were becoming soaked with Sentry blood.

"You haven't guessed? I'm a cursed shape-shifting vampire, duh," Trotter said smugly. "I've been stuck like this for a long time; shouldn't have gone after that witch-"

"Hey!" Bevan protested, wriggling angrily from side-to-side. "This is my big reveal! You can't take the attention off me like this!"

Main glared at him. "Fine. Answer Helena's question."

"I may have accidentally, on purpose, brought you forward in time."

"Really? Really?!" 

*cue ad-break*

Oh! And who is your favorite character so far? Let us know in the comments. =D