Beautiful (Crowns Of Bearers # 1) !EDITED!

~ • The Brotherly Love~

Aleyna's P.O.V.

I never thought that there would be a point in my life wherein I wouldn't be able to understand anything. I didn't think they'll be a time in my life when I couldn't even think of anything. My mind was blank for a moment then the next minute it will be filled with so much question and be reminded of the past. I tried to ease my mind, clearing them but now I don't even know what to do... I'm not even sure if I could handle and stay being like this...

"So this is where you are" Nathan appeared beside me and handed me a juice, my favorite grape juice that always had made me smile even in the past.

"Were you looking for me? I just wanted to have fresh air for a few minutes" I tried to smile, playfully acting a bit cute so that he would believe me. Nathan stared at me for a few minutes before he sighed and unfolded the chair beside me.

"You've been here for half an hour, you can't call that a few minutes" I was?

"Sometimes I just really need to detach myself from reality, I don't think it'll be good for me to keep thinking hurtful thoughts over and over again. I wanted to let myself be free rather than dwelling on the past and not ever trying to recover again"

"Blaze meant that much to you didn't he? That he's more than special in your heart, that there's something more in him. Something that might probably be the reason why you still can't leave the past and forget him"

Nathan had always known what I have in mind, he's always sure of my feelings, he always knows everything about me and knows what I am feeling. It's almost as if he's my twin but we just didn't got conceived at the same time, maybe he just knows that because he was a great brother to me even when I was still inside our mother's tummy.

But back to his words, he was right. There's something about Blaze that I couldn't help but not to hate him, that I couldn't help but not to just move on and just leave the past like that. I didn't want to go back to the past, I didn't want to open and feel the pain once more but I couldnt help but to remember it no matter how hard I try not to. The moment I saw Blaze, everything seemed to come back to me, all the pain, all the tears I shed for him, all the selfless act I did just for him... I wanted to hate him with all my heart, curse him and wished that he's dead... but I can't...

"I still love him"

Nathan stilled on his seat, enable to speak, probably not expecting that I am still in love with him. He's probably thinking that when he had hurted me in the past, I would've hated him with all my heart, that I would've cursed him with every fiber of my body that I would've wanted him dead...

But the more I see him, the more I look in his eyes... I couldn't help but to remember the time I've spent with him. When I hear his laughs I could always remember the fun filled laughters we shared as he kept telling me jokes which are very corny. His beautiful voice makes me remember all the songs we've sang in the past... I couldn't help but always remember the happy times we've shared... I've had more fun times with him than the sorrow and pain I felt...

"Aleyna? Dear" Both my attention and my brother's turned behind us, seeing the backdoor open with our parents standing there with a smile.

"Mom? Dad? You're back?" I was the first one to stand up and reacted right away, I wrapped my arms around my parents and welcomed them home. Nathan must've also been surprised and nervous to finally meet them after so many years. The moment I let them go I noticed Dad's eyes watered as he stared right in the eyes of his eldest son, his usual favorite which is very understandable in our family.

"Nathan? My son"

He extended his hand which made Nathan slowly come near him, they both huggex each other tightly. Mom was shedding tears, expressing how much she missed her first child, it must've been hard for mom to not see her son for so many years and to not contact him while he was away.