Am I wrong

Co Parent

My week off was over and now I'm thinking of a way to tell Steven that I can't do this anymore with him. The waiting turned into a week then that turned into two. I honestly didn't know if I could do it not to him but to myself. I didn't know how he would take it or what his response would be but I was prepared for the worst. Courtney and I sat in her room many nights she gave me reasons on why it would be good for us. I cried into her shoulder on why I couldn't let him go or see him with someone else.

We resolved our issues he would apologize every chance he got then tried to give me a kiss but ended up getting a hand in his face. It wasn't the right time for me to be all lovey dovey in his face before I make this huge decision. I'm ready and would like it if he would accept what I want without a fight or huge argument but with Steven you never knew what you would get.

Aliyah's getting so big and she's already crawling everywhere and tearing up causing so much trouble. It's like each day she looks more and more like her daddy Steven which makes this decision even harder on me. Looking at her is like looking right at Steven my mom says it because I missed him so much when I was pregnant. If so then I couldn't even look at Aliyah and say she's not his child. No one can she looks just like that high yella bastard that love.

I put Aliyah in her bouncer opening up my laptop to do some research for Courtney. I heard a knock at the front door. Aliyah just stared at me clapping her hands she learned that from my mom. I grabbed her out the bouncer taking her with me to answer the door. I opened it to my surprise it was Steven standing there in his work uniform, "Can I come in?" I sighed pushing the door further open so he could come inside. He closed the door behind him Aliyah immediately started reaching for him whining I sighed rolling my eyes.

He took her from me kissing her chubby cheeks, "Daddy's baby girl is getting big." Aliyah made baby noise clapping her hands I walked back into my room sitting on the bed Steven followed. "You missed me baby girl" he cooed to Aliyah. I sighed wishing he would shut up so I could focus he cut his eyes at me,"I think mommy misses daddy too." I smirked,"You ain't my daddy" I mumbled under my breath. He sat Aliyah back in her bouncer smirking back at me,"That's not what you be saying when we-" I covered my ears not wanting to hear what else he had to say.

Walking over to the bed he uncovered my ears,"You don't wanna here why you call me daddy Michelle." I rolled eyes knowingly,"Steven please." He laughed climbing on top of me,"What baby you scared of what daddy might do to you." I laughed at how ridiculous he sounded right now,"Boy stop playing and get off of me I have stuff I need to do." He started kissing my neck,"I have stuff I need to do to and I'm looking at it." He scanned my body slowly placing my hands beside my head kissing my lips softly,"I missed these lips."

I couldn't resist I kissed him back,"I guess you can say I missed you too." His hand slid underneath my shirt I gasped,"Steven." He smirked against my lips before biting my lower lip he groaned,"It's been so long baby girl I need you right now." I moaned as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. My mind was racing all I could think about was the co parent plan but my body was saying some other things. His hands slid underneath me he grabbed a hand full of my ass I groaned biting my lip I was so turned on.

There was a knock at my bedroom door,"Michelle?" I heard my mom say from outside the door. He pulled away from,"Shit." I laughed rushing to answer the door trying to fix my shirt,"I'm coming momma." I waited until Steven fixed his pants to open the door she looked my up and down,"Is Steven here I seen his car in the driveway." I nodded quickly trying to calm myself down,"Um yeah he came to see Aliyah why?"

"Oh! Well I was bringing chicken home and wanted to now if yall wanted some" I looked back at Steven who was checking out my ass. I turned back to face her,"Yeah we want some thanks mom." I closed the door before she could say anything else. I sat on the bed taking a deep breath. Steven hovered over me kissing my forehead,"You alright." I shook my head,"We have to talk about something really important." He nodded scatching his head,"Wassup."

I sat up picking up Aliyah sitting her in my lap,"Well I was thinking maybe we shouldn't be in a relationship-"He shook his head cutting me off," Wait what?" I sighed,"Its not that I don't love you Steven I do but this relationship this is not what I think is best for us right now." The look he was giving right now made me feel sick to my stomach. He just don't know how much this hurt me to say this to the person I love most in the word.

"What about Aliyah she's not go have her father in her life... You go have some other chump trying to replace me again in my child's life." His tone was harsh and cold,"Steven I never replaced you or even tried to!" He shook his head,"What do you want me to do Michelle accepted this bull shit you trying to pull on me."

"Please Steven I don't want to argue in front to Aliyah he looked down at her tears in his eyes,"You trying to take my baby girl away from me." I shook my head tears sliding down my cheeks,"I've never wanted to do that Steven please." He blinked the tears gone replaced with anger,"Yes you are I know you ain't come up with this bull on your own."

Aliyah soon started crying I started patting her back and rocking her gently tears streaming down my face,"Please just listen to me." He nodded not even looking at me,"All I'm saying is there shouldn't be a me and you until we graduate and figure out what we're going to do with our lives. Things won't change between us but us being intimate."

He scoffed rolling his eyes,"Intimate! You barely even let me kiss you." I stared at him in disbelief,"Your still mad because I'm not ready yet to have sex again after I let you in the first time and got pregnant like a fool at sixteen. Trust me Steven if it can happen once it can happen again!" This time I was the one angry to me all he seemed to care about was getting in my pants again. I was so stupid to actually think he really cared for me.

"I didn't mean it like that Michelle" he said quickly. "You never mean it like that Steven!" he moved closer to me,"You have to believe me I would never use you like that I love you way too much. I just let my sexually urges for you get the best of me sometimes." He took Aliyah from me placing her in her crib she was asleep hard to believe with all the noise. Sitting back down he pulled me into his chest holding me,"I love you I'm just scared to mess up again" I cried into his chest.

He rubbed my back,"I love you too I'm just scared to lose you and Aliyah. I lost you once and I'm not going to do it again." The conversation went way worse than I thought if could have been a lot better and most definitely at a better time. At least I can sleep now knowing I told him and not keeping it inside worrying all through the night.