This is How I Disappear

Kiss me

"You are a wonderful person Gerard Way and thank you for putting up with me."

"Honey please you can be a pain in the butt sometimes but I still would love to have you around."

"A pain in the butt huh?"

I walked over and grabbed a bucket of paint and walked back and then proceeded to pour it all over his head

"Do you still you want me around?"

he chuckled and smiled at me

"of course I do."

he came closer and pulled me into his arms

"I told you I want you around, I don't think a bit of paint is going to change that."

"you are a strange one Gerard Way."

"Of course!...and now..."

"Now what?"

"Revenge!!!!"

"No!"

he grabbed a bucket and chased me with it trying to pour it on me

"No Gee!"

"I am going to get you! you see!"

"No!"

he had me cornered and poured red paint all over my head

we both started to laugh

it was a bit silly

I couldn't stop laughing because I just remembered something

"now whats funnier than you covered in red paint?"

"ha ..ha....whats funny is that....these aren't my clothes ha!"

"oh why you!"

he started chasing me again

but I had a plan of my own

"Come here Ms. Bella!"

"Come and get me then!"

I laughed and ran and found the rest of the paints and dipped my hands

in the green paint and hid them behind my back

and went and made myself obvious to find

"there you are my dear, since you are wearing my clothes I won't mind if I do....this!"

he was about to pour another bucket of paint on my head but I stopped him

and put my green dripping hands on his face and laughed

"now that was my revenge!!"

i couldn't help but laugh

"oh yeah!"

he dipped his hands in the blue paint and splattered it all over my face

"Oh Gerard!! that's not fair!"

"Never said I play fair hun"

"oh why you!"

he pinned me against the wall

and i couldn't move

I couldn't help to notice the close proximity between us

those hazel eyes just stared into my own and that smile was on his face

and all I did was just stand there looking into those beautiful eyes

he came closer and it slipped out of my mouth those two words

"kiss me."

he came even closer and I closed my eyes and waited for him to kiss me but he stopped

right in front of my lips

"please, kiss me."

he just stood there and froze

"I...I...I am sorry but I can't"

and with that he just walked away from me.

I am so stupid

I let myself feel something

feel something I knew he wouldn't or couldn't feel about me

stupid.