Author: @K8Jam
Prompt: Blind Alden + Children's story book writer Maine
Prompter: @cai_ADMC
"Living with you is crazy, but I would be lost just imagining my life without you in it."
June 16, 2016
This is going to be one of the most difficult letters I will write. For someone who makes a living out of writing, I am suddenly at a loss for words on what to tell you. Besides, what else is left to say?
You were there for as long as I could remember. My not-so silent sentry without a sight. The anchor that stopped me from drifting away. The only one who never left me when everyone else has.
My mother left me on the side of the road when I was five. Can you imagine the very person who was supposed to love and care for you, stopped in the middle of the highway and dropped you off as if she was dropping you off to baseball practice? No words. No warnings. She pressed on the gas pedal as soon as the door slammed shut.
I remember trying to run after her in the middle of the pouring rain but I ended up slipping and scraping my knees. Next thing I knew, I'm in the middle of the city with a paper bag of food. I don't know how I got there or who brought me. While hiding in the alley behind the garbage can, a girl approached me. I don't know how she found me because I'm trying to be as small as possible. She took my hand and pulled me out of there and into the streets.
My life living in the streets is vague to say the least. There are so many things I couldn't remember except for that girl. There's something about her that doesn't sit well with me even though she's nice to me. She bosses me around a lot but I don't complain. It got me fed and away from social services. In the end, social services still got to me.
After a few years of living in the streets, I got sick. It still surprised me that I lasted that long without getting sick. The girl left when I started getting ill. I guess she doesn't want a burden. Not unlike what my mother did. I have never seen her again after that. Was it luck that someone happened to pass through the alley and saw me? Whatever it was, I am thankful that they did.
After getting treated in the hospital, I was moved to the orphanage. I tried to blend in the background but the bullies like to pick on me. Fortunately, it didn't take long before the couple who found me returned and adopted me. They took me home to this beautiful Tudor home complete with fence and a garden.
Do you still remember that day? That day when Isabel and Diego took me home from the orphanage? They led me into this beautiful yellow room with balcony looking over the gardens below. The room was painted with a scene from one of the stories Isabel wrote. Diego said he painted it there to remind me that my imagination is the only limit of what I am capable of. That's when I saw you.
It was the height of summer so I get why you were wearing glasses. But a plaid shirt and jeans, I thought you were trying to look cool. I said hello when Isabel and Diego stepped out of the room. You just inclined your head but didn't look my way.
I was used to rooming with other kids in the orphanage that I didn't mind you were staying in my room. Or I guess, our room. Neither of the couple bothered you so I didn't bother you either. Not until that one night.
At thirteen, they trusted us to be left alone in the house. I talk to you but you don't talk back. I didn't mind. At least I have someone close to my age to share my thoughts with. Then the storm hit. The thunder and lightning brought me back to that night when I was left on the side of the road. I watch as lightning lit up the sky and struck the earth before the thunder made its angry rumble. I was shaking like a leaf under the blankets when I felt you beside me. You hummed a nameless tune but it was enough to calm me down. That was the beginning.
Guardian angel. Confidant. Best friend.
You became all of those through the years. My angst-filled teenage years came with a barrage of reminder from you that I am better than what I think of myself. You encouraged me when I started discovering my writing skills, largely influenced by Isabel's career. You were there to listen and be my sounding board to whatever silly thoughts that came to my mind. My companion in my craziest or my stupidest ideas. My constant reminder that it's not all bad. Bullies, critics and haters. They don't matter. With you, there is no judgment.
Because you are you.
The same reason why this will be the most difficult goodbye I will ever say. Wanting you out of my life is the last thing I would think of. Not because I'm used to having you in my life. It is complete because I have you in it. In the end, you chose to do what's best for me. Even it meant disappearing from my life.
