USUK Oneshots (Hetalia) [Completed]

It's Hard to Write Out an Apology (Songfic)

(Author's note: This is based off of, and the note's words are the lyrics from the song Upsets and Downfalls by The Ready Set, though as of June 2018, I have changed some of the words to make it fit better and be less repetitive. I've put the song lyrics in the media part above. I don't own the song or the lyric video. This is also in America's POV)

After one of our fights, England storms out of the empty classroom. I love him so much, but I can't ever seem to make him happy. He's such a good guy and I'm just me. Average. No wonder I can never seem to be enough for him.

'Maybe I could write him some sort of apology, I always seem to mess up what I'm trying to say face to face,' I think before setting off to my locker to get some paper and a pen.

Dear England.
It's hard to write out an apology. Am I the person I'm supposed to be? Cause I'm a lover in a fighter's club. If my words fail to hold true, then I think you should know, I couldn't tell you to leave if I had to. But I can't make you believe that I want you. So please come over and I'll make right. All the sad nights and hard lines and I will look you in the eye, cause it's not over yet. Give me your heart, because I need it. You are a star shining down on me. I had a chance. And I could never disclose that chance. I've been running races on my own time, shutting out the people who have stuck with me my whole life, so if there's something I could say to re-stitch the ties that I let fray, then I would surely patch that tear, cause I care too much about you to just let you go. My mouth won't say I love that you love me, but I swear that's the case. If you're left with only tears I'm stuck with them too. I can't stand seeing you unhappy, so I won't let you down. I've missed you so badly, please give me your heart, because I need it so much. You are a star shining down on me. I had a chance and the chance might be over, but I wouldn't be able to accept that. Please know that I'm more sorry than my pride will ever say. You mean the world to me and it hurts me that I have been hurting you. Please come back to me.

By the time I finished writing it was the end of my study hall period and I had a whole sheet of sloppy writing. Wishing I had better writing to impress him, I sigh, knowing it's too late. It's more important he knows this than trivial things like that. Maybe he was right and I am just average. I wish I was better at everything, for his sake.

I pack up my homework quickly before rushing out of the classroom and running to his locker. By the time I get there, I see him at his locker and as I rush over, he slams the door shut, walking away quickly, clearly seeing me. I sigh in defeat, knowing if I call to him he'll ignore me. I just wish I made it there on time, maybe things would have turned out differently then.

Looking over to his locker, I decide to just slide the note into the slot and leave it at that. There's nothing I can do now.

I trudge home, disappointed with today's outcome. How come we can barely go a few days without fighting like this? I love him so much, he's my everything, and I wish I was the same for him. Who knows, maybe he'll read the note and this will all be over. And we'll be happy, just like we would be in a perfect world. A world where we both were happy together, where we could be ourselves and not care. I wish that world could be real.