In Darkness and In Light

Ice palace melting

6 days later...

Six long days and equally long lonely nights had filled my life. It was hard to grasp how much I relied upon Zak, for almost everything. It was no wonder that the man was stressed and finding it hard to cope.

I was a nightmare.

I'd learnt some valuable lessons in our time apart... One, that I need to do more to support him, if it meant sitting with him and answering some flipping emails then I'd sit there all night.

Two- That I need to learn how to cook, I'm woman for crying out loud, I should be taking care of him.

Three- That I needed to cut him some slack. My problems, were well... My problems, I needed to sort myself out and stop hoping Zak would fix everything.

Four- He's not a mind reader, neither am I. We need to communicate more. Our lives were built around work, travelling and the museum. We would both take stress and not vent until it was too late, by then we've had a blazing argument, I've cried, he's sulked and we sit in silence.

And finally Five - I needed to make sure that he had at least one day off a week. That would be easier said than done...

Whilst we have been apart, I have been researching on how I can help, some answers were obvious but I had never thought of it. Like remaining calm, trying to sort small problems before they progressed to big. Don't raise your voice, talk through any problems. Spend time with each other, but also allow each other to breathe etc.

I grew up with a fighting spirit in my body, one which had settled down when I moved in with Zak. It was like I had given up trying and simply followed him around. But whilst he was worried about work, I would have been in the back ground whinging about something so pathetic as to why he never spends time with me..

I was needy! There. I said it.

I tried to get his attention constantly, worried that if I didn't have it, someone else would. And that my beautiful people is unhealthy for any relationship.

Last night I had watched Ghost Adventures I know.. I know. I just wanted to see his face.

It was the Dorothea Puente episode, there was a small conversation that I had with Marty and Michael Parry which I had forgotten about until late last night.

They said "Your demons don't play nice with Zak's."

At the time I dismissed the whole thing, pushed it to the back of my mind where it's been sat since. But now I was wondering if they were trying to warn me about my sensitive side. With Zak being an empath and me being a clear projector. Had both of our abilities lead us to this point?

I mean... over make up? It wasn't a normal argument. It certainly didn't end well either.

The good news is over the past 6 days that my bruises were gone, I was split lip free and had a glowing tan.

California was beautiful, it was also still warm, something I didn't expect at this time of the year as we neared to the end of October. It was a good temperature which meant it was easier to handle, especially when walking around.

However, with the slight breeze it also meant I was unaware of when I caught my tan.

I'd rented a small cottage by the beach, it wasn't anything fancy, hell you only got wifi if you sat in the local café but I liked it.

Simplistic and minimal.

I had an unlimited view of the beach. A window which I could open up entirely and sit on the window seat.

I'd done that a few times and read a book.

But I could also sunbathe if the mood took me.

The morning started off like the last 6, I'd wake up and grab my phone. See no message and settle down in the bed for a sulk before starting my day.

Yes, since leaving Vegas I had radio silence from Zak and I hated it! It made me think of what he was doing most of the time. I could be looking at food in the supermarket and all of a sudden I'd be wonder what he is doing now? Museum probably. Or maybe at home with Gracie.

I never knew, I simply guessed.

I pulled out some denim shorts along with a beaker and black tank top. Putting my feet in some black sandals I headed out.

I did my routine walk into town, I'd have some breakfast at the café on a small table facing the bay, get some shopping done and a paper before heading back. I would stop once and that would be at a local bakery and buy myself a fresh bread stick before they closed at 3pm. Then with it under my arm I'd carry the bags back to the cottage and put the shopping away in the nook of a kitchen.

It was lovely, a simple life, a retirement lifestyle, one I could get used to, but I missed my mysterious 6 foot dark haired gladiator and his faithful companion.

Looking out the window at the bay, I smiled thinking of the small fantasy I had of walking along the beach, hand in hand with Zak whilst Gracie chased the shoreline waves. Sharing a laugh or two as she tried to guzzle the salt water or barked at a clump of seaweed that had been washed up.

I sighed knowing it would only happen in my dreams.

"That's-"

Another voice filled my ears and I instantly found a weapon and lashed out.

My poor breadstick snapped in half at the contact of a mouthwatering bicep. Watching it hit the floor, my eyes tore up to the intruder.

My heart heaved heavily in my chest as my weakness stared at me in the face. The shades of blue, green and grey melted whatever ice palace I had built around my heart after his stunt at the hotel. The Black shirt he wore fitted him like a second skin and the glasses perched on his nose showed my shocked expression. Suddenly the cottage felt like a shoe box, my emotions were having a hard time settling as I tousled between happy, sad, anger and relief.

I considered anger for the fact my bread stick was now ruined, crumbs were on the black tiled floor and that annoyed me more than ever. He was here less than two seconds making a mess.

"Hey Roo." Zak's voice emitted into the air again using the nickname he had for me.

6 days of silence and all I got was 'Hey Roo?!'