Hey. Waddup dudes. Well this is intended for you. I'm slapping it to your face that you chose to read the wrong book, nah, I mean t'is for me. This is well, sort of my editing plan. So this is how it goes.
One, I don't understand how this story got 200k views. I'm like, I wouldn't read this story! It's so childish. I don't know if you feel the same but I think my characters are not well built. I mean, did you notice, they're, almost all, thinks/acts almost the same. I cannot pin point who is Beary, who is Nathan if say I heard someone describing the scene where someone slipped.
I wasn't able to show that Nathan laughs inside but still helps the person get up. I wasn't able to show that Beary shows pure pity but doesn't do something to help. I wish someone gets me.
Two, I suck at describing the scenes. I mean, geez. I could've just said he farted but no! I would narrate and narrate and narrate. I don't know when to describe the scene and when to say it directly. I suck at that. I think sometimes describing the scene is not necessary but still goes on and describe.
Three, the inconsistency of the plot. Man this is serious like totally serious. One very important thing is I think with the revisions I made, the plot got twisted. In the beginning, Beary should be quesy and irrate and uncomfortable with Nathan and his antics. They shouldn't have gotten too much physical attraction coz those with philophobia doesn't easily trust and don't have friends but alas! Beary has, and not just one but a lot! Worked on it but I still dont think it enough.
Four, I tend to add characters and then forget to include them on the succeeding parts.
Well. One, I don't know how to wrote a review. Two, I'm just blabbing. Three, these are my editing points. Four, I'm lazy. It'll take time for me to actually finish revising and editing this. Anyways, thanks for reading!
P.S. This is a child's play. Everything originally written in this book is written by a childish 15 year old who loves anime and everything childish. I've quite matured. Lol. Never.
BINABASA MO ANG
Mr. Casanova cured my love phobia
Teen FictionTwo broken souls brought together by fate. Two, among seven billion people, who are both afraid to fall in love. One is afraid to take risk in love, one is out to play with love. Nathan never wanted a serious relationship. BEARY never wanted to be...
